When I Fall
by Ziny-DiNozzo
Summary: Addison and Meredith knew each other long before they met at SGH. A lifetime ago they shared something. Freindship, love, dreams; pain. What happens when their secret past catches up with them? Mer/Add R&R COMPLETE, SEQUEL ON THE WAY
1. Things Are Gonna Be Different Baby

_**AN:**So here is MY first published Mer/Add fic of many! I hope you like it :)_  
_**Disclaimer:** Grey's Antomy and Meredith and Addison so not mine (though if i owned Addison well... JOKING)  
**Dedication:**For Elle (xoxEllexox) Who is so the coolest person for dedicating her GREAT new fic to me and two other (obviously) awesome people :) :)_  
_**Summary:**_ _Addison and Meredith knew each other for a long time before they met at Seattle Grace Hospital._

_They shared something. A lifetiem ago they shared something. Freindship, love, dreams... pain._

_It's all in the past, but what happens when their secret catches up with them?  
_

* * *

**  
When I Fall**

**Chapter One - Things Are Gonna Be Different Baby  
**

Addison walked towards the familiar building; she wasn't quite sure where she'd find him but the lobby seemed a good place to start.

Checking she looked presentable, she walked into Seattle Grace Hospital looking for her husband.

She barely heard the conversation her husband was having as she walked in looking high class in her black coat, compared to the scrubs of the doctors and nurses scattered through out the sweeping lobby.

"I think I like this rules thing."

"Me too." That was his voice.

She stopped walking and saw her husband helping a woman fix her coat. That must be the intern he'd been sleeping with.

Her husband bent down and picked up a bag, and as he turned around about to leave, his eyes found hers. He stared at her a second and she looked back before taking a breath and walking forward in confidence.

As she walked he turned to the woman next to him, "Meredith, I am so sorry."

The woman, Meredith, looked at him slightly confused, but then followed his gaze to Addison.

Addison looked at her and stoped walking.

"Mere?"

"Addie?"

"Oh my God. Sweetheart, it's you!" Smiled Addison taking Meredith into a hug,

Meredith hugged back, a grin on her face, "I can't believe this," She pressed her lips to Addison's cheek, "Why didn't you tell me you were coming to Seattle?"

"I didn't know you were here." Laughed Addie, squeezing Meredith before pulling back, their arms still around each other, "You're wearing scrubs of your own now!" She grinned,

Meredith laughed, "No, these are your old scrubs, the one's you gave me when we moved."

"God, you still wear them?"

Meredith just nodded, grinning stupidly with Addison when she noticed Derek staring at them with his eyebrows raised.

"Oh right," She said, letting go of Addison and taking her hand, walking them closer to Derek. "Derek, this is-"

"Addison." Derek finished, "What are you doing here?"

"Well, you'd know if you'd bothered to return any one of my phone calls." Addison replied coolly. She turned to Meredith, "So not only are you an intern, you're the intern my husband's been sleeping with."

"Husband?" Meredith said weakly, looking from Addison to Derek.

She took two steps back and turned back to Addison, "Oh God, Addie… H-husband?"

Addison led Meredith to a chair, "Shshhhshhh." She soothed, "It's okay, you didn't know, you haven't got anything to worry about, okay?"

"Meredith…" said Derek, walking forward.

"Derek back off." Murmured Addison, "Mere? Sweetie, do you want me to stay with you tonight?"

Meredith shook her head, "No, I got… Roommates and-"

"Okay, how about you stay at my hotel then? Come on." She helped Meredith up and started to lead her out of the building.

"Wait, Meredith."

Meredith turned and slapped Derek across the face. He recoiled back holding a hand to the bright red print on his cheek.

"Ok, I deserved that."

Meredith then punched him in the face and yelled, "_When the hell were you going to tell me you have a __wife__?!_" And she stormed out of the hospital, Addison closely behind her.

"I'll drive." Addison said taking the keys from Meredith's hand.

Once in the car Addison turned to Meredith, "Mere? Look at me."

Meredith looked up, tears in her eyes.

"Oh Baby," Murmured Addie, wiping the tears away and brushing Meredith hair back, "Don't cry. Shh, don't cry baby."

Caressing her cheek, Addison lent forward and brushed her lips softly over Meredith's. Meredith clung to Addison and kissed her deeply.

"Addison," moaned Meredith, "I've missed you, Addie."

Addison pulled back but lent her forehead against Meredith's, looking deeply into the other woman's eyes.

"I've missed you too, Baby."

**tbc**

_Well? What do you think? Love it? Hate it? Think I Should continue? I have a great plan for Addie and Mere's past..._

_BTW can people please tell me when i write OOC (though this fic will have quite a different behaviour for Mer/Add when they're around each other :P)_

_**REVIEW!!!!**_


	2. I Know Our Lives Are Changing

_Thanks to all the great reviews (and favs/alerts)_

_This is yet again dedicated to xoxEllexox (she was the one to get me to watch Grey's in the first place)_

_**THis chap has scenes from 2x01 (i do not own ) mostly Mer/Der and Mer/Add bits**  
_

**Chapter Two – I Know Our Lives Are Changing**

Addison and Meredith were in the car driving towards Addison's hotel,

"Why can't we go to a bar?" Asked Meredith,

"Because, Mere, I know you when you're drunk, and right now is not the time for alcohol."

"I just found out my boyfriend's married, to my best-friend, no less. How is this not the time for alcohol?"

Addison laughed, "You make a good point, but I will not cave." She pulled over, and Meredith looked out the window to see an all-night convenience store,

They got out of the car and walked in, Meredith going straight to the fridge full of mixed drinks.

Addison rolled her eyes and grabbed a tub of cookies and cream ice-cream, a huge block of chocolate, and two strawberry milks before walking to the counter, Meredith placing a bottle of vodka with it.

"No alcohol." said Addie, "I don't care if Derek's married to five people, put it back."

"I hate you, and your stupid lying husband." Meredith grumbled,

"Oh, join the club."

Meredith put away the vodka reluctantly and waited while Addison paid. When they arrived at the hotel they made their way up to Addison's room.

Addison found a spoon and handed it to Meredith with the tub of ice-cream, and the two went and made them selves comfortable on the bed.

"I slept with his best friend." Addison said suddenly,

Meredith looked at her, "Why?"

"Derek was just so… absent. He was withdrawing himself. Staying late at the practice, taking extra shifts, and if he wasn't at work he was asleep. And Mark was… there. Mark understood, because Derek was withdrawing from everyone."

"But I told you about Derek, how did you not know?"

"Well I thought you were in Boston, and you never told me his name, always McCharming."

"McDreamy." Corrected Meredith,

"McMarriedAss."

Meredith laughed, "You never told me you and you're husband- you and Derek, were having problems."

Addison sighed, "Well to be honest I was preoccupied with trying to figure out what was wrong with him, but then he walked in on me and Mark, and he left. We got separated, and I became so busy with trying to keep the practice running."

Meredith gave Addison the spoon, and Addie scooped up a spoonful of the ice-cream and ate it, smothering her old problems with the tasty goodness. They spent the next couple of hours eating the ice-cream and chocolate while drinking their strawberry milk and complaining about Derek and men in general.

The next morning, Addison woke early to Meredith kissing her softly. She smiled and pecked Meredith once before sitting up.

"I'm not going to sleep with you, Mere."

"Did I say anything about sex?"

Addison smirked, "No, but your hand loosening my pants did."

Meredith glanced at the clock, "I really do not want to go into work today."

"It'll be fine."

Meredith sighed, "No it won't." She jumped up and made her way to the shower,

Addison rummaged around in her suitcase a pulled out a pair of salmon scrubs, Meredith came out wrapped in a towel, water dripping down her body.

"Can you get a taxi; I want to go to my house so I can get dressed and everything." Asked Meredith,

"Yea sure. Order some breakfast will you, I'm gonna get in the shower."

Meredith nodded, and dressed in yesterday's clothes.

Stopping by at the house was awkward, Meredith walked in, almost running into Izzie who was only half awake, having been on-call half the night, a cup of coffee was tightly in her hand.

She smirked, "Good date with McDreamy last night?"

Meredith glared at her,

"What I say?"

Meredith ran into the house and quickly came back out with fresh clothes on, and a clean pair of scrubs in her backpack.

"We taking your car, Mere?" Asked George,

Meredith sighed and nodded, climbing into her car with the others and driving them into work.

* * *

Bailey walked into the intern locker room where George and Izzie were discussing the fight with Alex, and Meredith was avoiding questions from Cristina about Derek.

"Ok, people, assignments. Yang, you're on discharges. O'Malley report to room E19. Grey come see me, and who was on call last night?"

Bailey handed over charts to Alex and Izzie,

"Sloppy, sloppy, sloppy. Redo these and return them to me before lunch, understood?"

"Understood." Muttered Alex as he left,

"Karev, don't tempt me." threatened Bailey before turning to Meredith, "Somebody's popular."

"Meaning?"

"There's been a special request, just for you."

* * *

Derek walked towards Burke in the hallway, "So. Congratulations are in order."

"Don't sweat it Shepherd. I'll only be your boss for a few days." Smirked Burke

"I'm well aware of Richard's recovery time. I'm the one who operated on him, remember?"

"I do. You operated. He survived and chose me to take over while recruiting your wife."

"Clearly, he has brain damage."

"Or is it your ex-wife? I'm a little fuzzy on that." Burke tormented,

"We're separated." Derek told him as Addison walked over to them.

"Sorry to interrupt, Dr. Burke." She smiled,

"You're never interrupting."

"She's always interrupting." Muttered Derek,

"I was just checking to see if Dr. Burke secured the intern-"

Meredith walked over smiling at Addie, "Intern you requested." She finished, "He did."

Burke left and Derek looked between Addison and Meredith, he sighed and left as well.

Meredith and Addie made their way to their patient, Julie's, room.

"Define TTTS." Addison said as she read Julie's chart.

"Twin-twin transfusion syndrome. Conjoined foetal twins." Meredith answered,

"Connected by?"

"Blood vessels in the placenta."

"Meaning?" She paused, Meredith didn't answer, "One twin gets too much blood, the other too little, endangering the lives of both. You know that Meredith."

"They told me there wasn't much chance anything could be done." Julie said to Addison,

"TTTS is usually impossible to correct. Unless you happen to be one of a handful of surgeons in the world who knows how to separate foetal blood vessels. Which, luckily for you, I am. So were gonna get you into surgery tomorrow. If you have any questions at all please ask Dr. Grey. She's fantastic, has been since high school," Addison raised a hand nest to her mouth, as if telling a secret; "She quizzed me when I was an intern."

With a smile Addison and Meredith left the room,

"I could've answered your question had you given me the chance."

"I know, but I'm this tough on everyone, not just the women my husband sleeps with." She smiled a bit to let Meredith know she was just teasing, "Order an ultrasound for her and pre-op labs in full." Meredith started to walk away, but Addison called after her, "And how's Mindy, by the way? I try to keep in touch but the last six months or so have been…" She trailed off,

Meredith smiled, "Yea, Mindy's good, you should give her a visit, she loves you."

Addison laughed, "Oh I know."

* * *

Meredith was preparing to give Julie an ultrasound. She squeezed the gel onto Julie's stomach and grabbed the ultra sound wand.

"What does it take to go after another woman's husband?" Julie asked quietly,

"Excuse me?"

"It happened to me. Jeff moved in with a long-legged miniskirt who answers his phones, three weeks into my pregnancy. By the way, that gel is really cold."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry about your husband."

"Are you sorry about Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd's husband?"

Meredith raised her eyebrows, "Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd's husband is a completely different matter. They were separated, and he never told me about her until she came her for you yesterday." She gave Julie a small smile, "But I am sorry, for Addison more then her husband."

"I bet she asked to work with you. It's what I would have done."

"As Dr. Montgomery said earlier, I've known her since I was in high school." Meredith stood, "I'm gonna go check on your labs."

* * *

Derek and Addison were in the hallway having a whispered argument, "That took a lot of nerve."

"Oh come on, I've known her for years and I just wanted to see how she's come along, besides, she came highly recommended."

"Right."

"So you don't recommend her?"

"No, I did not say that."

"Just not for her medical skills." Refined Addison,

"Oh, would you shut up?"

Meredith walked up and without thinking, addressed Addison, "Sweetie."

"Yes?" Addison and Derek both looked at her,

Meredith glared at Derek then turned to Addison, "Labs confirm what look like abnormalities on the ultrasound. I think you should come and see for yourself."

"Ok, let's go."

"Meredith." Derek said, "Meredith."

Meredith turned, "Don't." She said simply,

* * *

That night, when Meredith and Addison got off, they took a taxi to a nice little house on the edge of the city, letting Izzie and George drive Meredith car back to her house.

Addison paid the fair and the two women walked up to the front door and knocked. It was only eight o'clock but still quite late to be visiting unannounced.

The door was opened by a small girl in pyjamas. She had sandy hair down to her lower back, pulled into a plat to keep it neat for bed.

"Mindy!" Smiled Addison, with a moch gasp, "What are you doing up so late?"

Mindy grinned, "Aunty Addison!" Addison hugged the girl, "Aunty Addison I'm eight years old." She said proudly, "I'm aloud to stay up 'til eight-thirty."

"Eight-thirty?" Asked Meredith with exaggerated shock, "Those daddies of yours spoil you don't they little miss Mindy?"

Mindy laughed and shook her head, "Nah-uh!"

"Mindy-Pie?" Called a voice, "Who's at the door?"

Mindy turned towards the house, "Aunty Addison and Mummy!"

"What?" A man walked into view, "Addie, Mere!" He kissed both their cheeks, "What you doing here?"

"Oh you know," smiled Addison, "We were in the neighbourhood."

Meredith ruffled Mindy's hair, "Thought we'd pop in and visit my daughter."

_TBC_

_**Review please! it keeps me going.**_

oh and Elle, you owe me one update! Thanks! xo  



	3. We Gotta Be Strong

_Elle you so owe me an update._

_**This chap has some scenes from 2x02 which are unfortunately not mine :(**  
_

**Chapter 3 – We Gotta Be Strong**

Meredith was once again going to be staying at Addison's hotel room. After yesterday, everybody knew the rumours about Mrs McDreamy, and Meredith was in no mood to talk about it, to explain everything. Telling them about Addie would mean telling them about Mindy, somewhere she did not want to go.

"Well she's still as energetic as ever." Commented Addison, as she started to change into pyjamas before handing Meredith an extra pair of navy scrubs to wear to bed.

Meredith laughed and nodded,

"And she's gorgeous." Grinned Addie, "Like you."

"Thank God she looks like me," Meredith spoke, "I wouldn't be able to look at her otherwise."

Addie nodded, "You're really great with her."

Mere smiled and climbed into the bed, Addison following. As soon as Addison was settled, Meredith swung her leg around and straddled her.

"Mere…" Addison said in a small voice, "What-" She was cut off by Meredith's mouth claiming hers.

As soon as Meredith's lips made contact with Addison's she felt the familiar tingling sensation that gave her weak kneed, light headed, irrational, a _fantastic_ kisser and completely powerless to her own actions.

So even though her brain was using all its power to pull away, tell Meredith 'no', Addison's arms pulled Meredith closer, their mouths moving so perfectly against each other like they had all those years ago.

Meredith drew back for air and the two lay panting, drinking the oxygen in.

"I don't wanna be that." Whispered Addie,

"What?"

"Your rebound from Derek."

Meredith looked away, "Oh."

Addison sighed and let her hands run up and down Meredith's sides, "It's just if you keep kissing me I'll loose control, and I don't want to ruin anything between us."

Meredith didn't say anything.

"Mere? Look at me Baby."

Meredith looked and Addison smiled softly, "You understand don't you?"

"Yea."

The next morning when Addison woke up it was to room service, Meredith had gone, but let her peace offering known by ordering Addison's favourite breakfast.

* * *

Addison took a sip of her coffee, she was planning to check in on the chief, but she saw a familiar female in the room.

"I thought I saw a fabulous looking woman walk by." She greeted,

"Addison!" Grinned Richard's wife, before taking Addie in a hug, "Yes see, I told Richard I knew you and Derek would get back together."

"Ah actually I'm here on a case."

"Addison and I are over Adele." Derek said as he looked over Richard's chart,

"Well you're not divorced, have you tried counselling?

"We had adultery. That was enough." Said Derek stiffly,

"I'll call you later, okay?" asked Addie, "I need to find my best friend."

Derek raised his eyebrows, "Seriously? Best friend?"

"Closest friend I've ever had." Smiled Addie before walking away,

* * *

"Dr. Grey, may I speak with you for a moment?" Addison asked as she found Meredith with Bailey,

Meredith looked at Bailey, seeking permission to leave with Addison,

"Don't look at me for help."

Meredith frowned but then remembered only Derek knew Addie was her friend. Shaking her head slightly she walked down the corridor with Addison.

"I assume he's told you his victimised version of why he left me."

"With all do respect, this has nothing to do with me." Meredith lowered her voice, "You made that clear last night." She started to walk away but Addison followed,

"So you're not taking him back. Good."

Meredith scoffed,

"I'm not here to get back with him, pull him back to New York so he can ignore me again." Addison's voice turned to a whisper, "I have my lawyer writing up divorce papers."

Meredith sighed and walked into a cupboard, trying to get away but Addison walked in after her and next thing Meredith knew, she was pressed against the door, Addison kissing her deeply. Meredith melted into the kiss, and they held each other close, their tongues duelling.

Eventually Addison pulled back, "I- uh, have to go." And she left Meredith alone in the cupboard.

* * *

"George has a little crush." Izzie teased as George, Cristina, Izzie and Mere sat their table for lunch,

"I do not have a crush." George said awkwardly, as he continued to fiddle with the Judy doll body (a joke Alex played to do with a patient).

Cristina laughed as George continued to awkwardly try to define his not-crush, "It is a thing. A thing that is very personal. One day I would like to build on this thing with this other girl- Woman. She's all woman."

Meredith snatched the doll from George and slammed it down, "What are you doing?" She snapped,

"I was playing with-"

"No George, with Olivia." Meredith picked the doll up again and used it to point at George for emphasis, "What are you doing with Olivia?"

"Oh. Nothing."

"You're letting her think you're emotionally available. You're letting her think she has a chance." Addison walked through Meredith's view as she raised her voice at George, "And there is nothing worse in the world than thinking you have a chance when you really don't!"

Addison heard this and stared at Meredith, something Izzie noticed.

"So it's true then?" Asked Izzie, "They are married?"

Meredith nodded once.

"Seriously?" Asked Cristina, making no effort to hide the fact she had turned to get a glimpse of Addison, "Pfft, who does she think she is? McHotstuff?"

"Well yeah." droned Alex from the next table, "Smoking."

"Shut up Alex."

He grinned,

Cristina scoffed, "What ever."

Meredith looked over at Addison and almost smiled, Addie didn't think of herself as McHotstuff, but Meredith sure as hell did.

* * *

Derek stood in the elevator as it came to a halt, everyone but him exited and Addison walked on.

"Just when the day was improving." He muttered,

"You told Meredith what happened?" Addison asked,

"I did. Why? What did you tell her?"

The doors closed, "That I'm not here to drag you to New York where you can ignore me again."

"What? Wow. That's your side of this? That I didn't pay you enough attention. Is that you were thinking when you got naked with my best friend?"

"No, by that point I wasn't thinking at all Derek. By that point I was just scratching an itch. We got successful you and me. We got busy and we got lazy. We didn't even bother to fight any more Derek. And Mark was there and I missed you. But we need to talk about this. If we're so practically divorced then what's stopping us?"

"Nothing."

Derek walked out of the elevator leaving Addison with a small smile on her face.

**_TBC  
_**

**!review!**

_Oh, and i might not update this in a while, cos i wanna finish my main fic 'A Kiss and a Promise' (NCIS, tiva, mcabby, jibbs) by the 17th of Sept and i has about 10 or so chaps left. All my focus will go into that, but dont worry i'll get back to this one (i swear)_


	4. You Know I'm Thinking About You

_This is a long un-proof-read chapter, :) _

**Chapter 4 ****– You Know I'm Thinking About You**

Meredith and Addison were jogging through a park.

"Ugh!" panted Addie, "You're stupid, stupid jogging, God I want to kill you right now." She stoped jogging and Meredith turned around and jogged to her, they both started again and Meredith spoke,

"Endorphins are good. Endorphins are mood elevators. This is supposed to make us feel better."

"Feel better? All I can think about is all the ice-cream and chocolate we ate." Addison stopped again and lent over her knees trying in vain to catch her breath,

"I'm stupid." Meredith agreed as she ran circles around Addie,

"Slutty mistress."

"Adulterous whore."

"Sleeping with Derek was a _great_ idea." Addison said sarcastically,

Meredith stopped jogging now, "You know what's ruined for me?"

"What?"

"Ferry boats! I used to love ferry boats and Derek's got a thing for ferry boats. Now every time I see a fricken ferry boat…" Her voice trailed off,

"You know what's ruined for me? Apples. And Muesli! God I used to love muesli."

They fell to the ground and lay down, "Have you cried?" Asked Meredith,

"Urgh. Yes. I am over crying."

"Do you think I'll feel better if I cry?"

"Probably." shrugged Addison, "Do you wanna cry now?"

"No."

"Then let's… let's jog."

* * *

Later that morning Derek stood in the elevator with Richard discussing when he should be cleared for surgery.

"If you want me to clear you so soon, maybe you should've thought about that before you gave chief to Burke and invited Satan to Seattle." Derek told him,

The elevator doors opened and Addison walked in with Meredith,

"Satan?" Richard asked,

"Good morning." said Addie, "Richard, like the hat."

"Satan speaks."

"Actually," Addison said, "I prefer to be called Ruler-Of-All-That-Is-Evil." Meredith chuckled, "But I will answer to Satan."

Meredith lent over and whispered in Addison's ear, "Your new nick-name."

Addison smiled, "You're no Angel."

"What is she still doing here?" Derek asked Richard,

"I asked her to stay. We have a pediatric surgery attending on maternity leave."

Addison but in, "Actually I could use you on a consult. Will you ah meet me up there Derek?"

"Ah yeah. Fine." The elevator stoped,

"Crap, I'm late for rounds." Said Meredith, she pecked Addie's cheek then ran out, Derek staring after her as Addison walked elegantly past.

Addison was walking through a corridor when she heard Bailey talking to her interns (Meredith not amongst them).

"Hey there's a new surgical case coming up from the pit. Likely direticulitis. Let's go."

The interns all ran after her and Addison heard a very loud and familiar voice yelling, "Watch it! Hands off me! I could report you to the chief and you'd be out on your ass." Addison winced, this would not be good, "Where is the chief?!?" Yelled the voice,

"Patient's name is …ah…" Cristina said,

" Where is the chief?!? You're all amateurs."

"Complaining of intermittent cramping pain and diarrhea." Cristina continued, avoiding the patient name, "Also suffers from …ah…"

Addison watched the patient being rolled out on a gurney still yelling,

"AMATEURS!"

"Alzheimer's." Continued Cristina,

"Patient's name?" Asked Bailey, but the patient had noticed Addison and immediately sobered,

"Addison Montgomery!" She grinned, and Addie walked forward and accepted a hug from her, "How are you dear? It must be so hard for you, maybe even more then her. You do take care of her? You do take care of my little girl?"

Addison smiled and tried not to let too much go, "Yes of course I do Ell."

"And she's okay?"

"As well as she can be."

"And the baby?"

Addison winced, "The baby is perfectly healthy, adopted by a nice couple; both men and they adore her entirely."

"A girl? Meredith never told me her baby was a girl."

Everyone who had been pretending not to watch now stared.

Addison closed her eyes then opened them, "I think she wants to forget the whole thing." She forced herself to say,

"Patient's name?" Bailey asked again softly, as if in a trance,

"Ellis Grey."

"Meredith's mother." Choked out George,

Ellis seemed to be zoning everyone out, "Addison, dear. Do you know where my daughter is?"

Meredith rounded the corner at a small jog and froze.

"Darling!" Called Ellis, "Why didn't you tell me my grandchild is a little girl?"

Meredith stared like a deer in headlights at her mother, and everyone looking at her.

"Oh God." Meredith whispered, she felt so light headed, she felt like she would…

She fell into Addison's arms but didn't faint, "Come on," Murmured Addison, "Come on, it'll all be ok."

"Oh God. Oh God. Oh God."

They walked into the intern locker room and Addison sat Meredith down then closed the door.

"Oh God." Meredith repeated,

"Meredith, Baby, it is going to be _fine_."

Meredith looked up, "They know. They know and they're going to ask questions and look at me and judge me and-"

"Meredith!"

She stopped and Addie raised a hand to caress Meredith's cheek, "It will be okay."

Meredith nodded, "Can I get in on a-"

"Mere sweetie, you need distraction. Working with me won't distract you; it'll make you think of Mindy." She kissed Meredith softly, "I'm sorry but I have to go to my patient."

Meredith nodded and Addison took her in a hug, whispering in her ear as the door opened and the interns and Bailey stood there.

Addison let go and stroked Meredith's cheek once more before standing from her knees and walking out the doorway past the interns.

* * *

Near the end of the day Addison was chatting to Richard as they made their way to his office, "So I'm leaving tomorrow." Addison told Richard as they walked down a corridor,

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"No. I'm not accepting your resignation."

"It's not a resignation Richard. It's notification. I don't officially work for you."

They entered Richard's office,

"I came here for one case. I can track the twins progress from New York."

"What about the preemie?"

"I'm letting go of the preemie, you know that." Richard looked at her and Addison sighed, "I did not come here to get him back, the man calls Satan for God's sake."

"You don't like to hide from a fight."

"It's not a fight." Said Addie, "And unless Meredith suddenly sprouts wings or collapses, I'm leaving as soon as her mother stops shouting secrets through the hospital."

Addison turned to leave but saw an intern in the doorway to Richard's office,

"What is it O'Malley?"

"It's Dr. Grey, sir." Addie looked at him, "Ellis."

The three walked out and to the stairs talking about Ellis' case, Izzie met them at the bottom.

"Excuse me Dr. Shepard. We need you fast. Um… It's Christina, one of our interns. She's," Izzie paused, weary of George "she's collapsed."

"Christina's collapsed?" Asked George,

"Why do you need me?"

Izzie sighed but didn't say anything. Comprehension dawned on Addison and Richard,

"Christina's pregnant?!" Asked George

"Shut up George." Izzie snapped before turning back to Addison, "Please come."

Addison followed Izzie and turned to call over her shoulder, "This doesn't change anything Richard, as soon as Meredith ok I'm leaving,"

As Izzie and Addison walked Izzie couldn't help but ask, "Was it true?"

"Hmm?"

"What Meredith's mum said; was it true? Did Meredith have a daughter? Were you her doctor?"

"Dr. Stevens I don't think that-"

"'Cause I did." Interrupted Izzie quietly, "I had a daughter and gave her up. And I thought maybe Meredith would talk to me."

Addison went quiet, then lightly murmured, "How old were you?"

"Sixteen."

"Be careful when you approach Mere, it's a difficult subject. More then you can imagine. Right now though, Dr. Stevens, we need to focus on Cristina."

* * *

"Can you do the follow up?" Meredith asked Alex as they scrubbed out of surgery, "I wanna check on Christina." George had told her about the pregnancy,

"Yeah. You know what's wrong with her?"

Derek held her arms trying to be comforting, she glared at him pulling away and Derek held his hands up defensively.

"Don't!" Snapped Meredith,

"Sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I'm so tired it; you being sorry. Don't do it!"

"Dr. Grey-"

"Dr. Grey? Seriously?!" snapped Meredith, "Are you concerned about Alex finding out about us? Is that what matters to you? Do you really think he cares?" She turned to Alex, "Alex do you care that I was the intern stupid enough to screw the married attending?"

"No."

Meredith looked pointedly at Derek.

"It's okay."

"It's not okay!" Meredith almost yelled, "You have a wife! My best friend! My person. You're married to _my_ Addison! And she's impossible to hate, and she's gorgeously flirty and painfully smart and currently saving Cristina's life!"

Derek tried to speak to her softly, "Meredith just-"

"Don't! Stop talking to me like you're my boyfriend! Stop talking to me at all." She'd finished scrubbing out and she stormed from the room,

* * *

When Addison finished Cristina's operation she went and found Meredith.

"Come with me." Was all she said,

Meredith followed Addison without question, they walked into the NICU.

"Talk." Addie told Mere as she checked up on the preemie,

"You saved Cristina's life today. I didn't even know she was pregnant. No one did. And my mother's here. And she might have cancer. And she's talking about my dad. And she blabbed my biggest secret in front of all of my friends."

"They might be more understanding then you think." Murmured Addison,

"How! How could they understand what we went through?!"

"Well," Said Addie, "Cristina had this pregnancy, something she kept secret, even from the father, I bet."

"Cristina wouldn't understand. She'll pity me and underestimate me. She'd judge me. If she isn't already. Like they're not judging me already."

"Izzie would understand."

Meredith walked closer, "Why."

Addison sighed, "She asked me today, if what your mother said was true. She said that when she was sixteen she got pregnant and gave her baby up."

"Oh."

"Look. The way I see it we could deal with this and us in one of three ways."

"Option 1; we could wait out all the drama, get together and be happy as we live our lives like adults. Option 2; we could get together now, suffer the drama as a couple in rebound and eventually break-up."

"What's option three?"

Addison tucked Meredith's hair behind her ear, "You could let me flirt, let me fight for you, but accept I want to wait a little while before doing anything more then this…" She lent forward and kissed her softly, smiling as she pulled back.

"God you're so exhausting." Sighed Meredith, and she fell into Addison's welcome friendly embrace.

**tbc..**

REVIEW!  


_Also! I made a youtube video, a trailer of sorts, to a Grey's Anatomy crossover with Criminal Minds (a fic i'm planning to write called 'Reid's Anatomy) It's Mer/Der and Meredith/Spencer_

_**LINK- **www DOT youtube DOT com /watch?v=h6wnOfB5alE_


	5. Hear What I Say

_Ok so this chap has scenes from 2x04 Deny Deny Deny and i'm quite happy with it. I have changed the way things go a bit :P_

**Chapter Five – Hear What I Say**

Addison was making her way to the elevators when she saw Meredith walking from a patient's room.

"Hey," She smiled quickening her step to catch up to her and link arms casually, "Are you skipping rounds?"

"No, I'm avoiding my mother." Meredith said, pulling her arm away,

They stopped outside the elevator,

"Mere…"

"You've got a husband." She said,

"I know."

"You're life is complicated."

"I know."

"I don't need complicated. I have complicated all on my own." Meredith indicated the direction of her mother's room,

"I know."

"Stop saying 'I know'." Pouted Meredith,

Addie smiled, "Should I not make sudden movements?"

Meredith frowned, "Why are you making this funny?!"

Derek walked up behind Meredith and said, "Addison's leaving." Meredith jumped,

"What?"

"She doesn't have any more patients in this hospital."

"Stop talking about me like I'm not here." Addison glared,

"There's no reason for her to be here." Continued Derek, ignoring his wife,

"No reason?" Asked Meredith, eyebrows raised,

"None whatsoever."

He raised a hand to stroke Meredith's hair behind her ear but Addison stepped closer to Meredith and gave her a hug from behind.

"Well now, I think that staying to support my heart broken –sorry– my newly single best friend, is a huge reason to stay in town."

Derek gave her a look that plainly said… "Seriously?" He stared at her, "You're staying in town to mend Meredith's heart –sorry– support Meredith's romantic life?"

"Isn't this cosy?" smiled Addison, "Can I join in or are you not into threesomes?"

"I have to go." Meredith said, she gave Derek a strange look he didn't understand, and Addison a peck on the cheek, "Bye Satan, you're gonna crash at mine aren't you?"

"Yea, I'll see you later, Mere."

"Meredith," Derek said, she walked away and he turned back to Addison, "You really are Satan. You realize that right? If Satan were to take physical form, he'd be you. Everywhere, all the time."

"I am so not Satan."

"Even Meredith thinks you are. Now tell me, how come you haven't got on your broomstick and gone back to New York, where you belong? Don't give me this 'Meredith's broken heart' stuff."

"So am I a witch or Satan? Stop being so petty."

"Stop being an adulterous bitch."

"Well you don't have to worry about that." She sighed and pulled papers from her bag, handing them to Derek,

"Divorce papers,"

"You're lawyer said they're ok. They're signed but don't think I'm gonna fly out of here as soon as you've signed, ok? I meant what I said earlier, I'm sticking around for Mere."

"I'll sign them immediately." Smiled Derek, Addison gave him a look similar to the one Meredith had given him before, and walked into the elevator.

* * *

Later that day Meredith was making her way to pre-op when Addison grabbed her arm and pulled her into an empty on call room.

"I gave him the papers."

Meredith smiled, "That's good."

"All he has to do is sign, and I'm free." Grinned Addison, "We're free."

"And we can-" Meredith said hopefully, placing her hands on Addison's hips,

"Uh-buh-buh." Addison smiled, removing Meredith's hands and kissing her palms,

"Ok, well, I have to get to Pre-Op." Said Meredith,

Addie nodded, and gave Meredith a short but tender kiss on the lips then let her go, before following herself.

* * *

Meredith stepped onto an elevator. Addison was confusing as hell. Her mother kept running away. And Derek kept giving her that stupid 'I'm so McDreamy' smile.

The doors closed and Meredith sighed in relief to be alone. Her sereneness only lasted one floor. Derek walked on at the next stop.

Meredith groaned when he walked up to her.

"Meredith, Addison's leaving."

"She's not."

"She is! She gave me divorce papers. That she filed."

Meredith made a noncommittal sound.

"This is good. I'm going to read through them, sign, then I am free, _we_ are free! And Addison will be on the next plane to New York." He walked to her and caressed her cheek, "And everything will be fine."

Derek lent forward and brushed his lips over hers, kissing her softly, Meredith raised her hands away from him, but just as she placed them on his chest to push him away, the elevator stopped and the doors opened to Addison. Who gave them one short look and turned away.

Meredith pushed Derek off her then ran after her friend, "Addie!"

"Don't worry Meredith, I get it." Addison snapped, "I'll get out of your hair tomorrow."

* * *

Meredith didn't know who to talk to; she walked into her mother's room and locked the door.

"Meredith what are you doing here? You should be in bed, you just had a baby."

Meredith sat down, "Addison kissed me. Derek kissed me. My best friend and ex boyfriend kissed me on the same day."

"Do I look like a couple's therapist to you?" Snapped her mother,

"No, mum, no you don't." She turned around and saw Bailey standing in the door way,

"Don't start with me." Said Bailey, "Tell someone who cares."

* * *

Meredith and Addison were in the scrub room, Meredith scrubbing out as Addison looked down at the rings in her hand, the rings that bound her to Derek.

She sighed, "It's hard to accept the end when you're too close." She held the rings in the tips of her fingers, "It's gonna be different, that's for sure."

Meredith was looking at the rings and realised something. Those rings were the only things in her way. Without them she could have who she wanted. She just wasn't sure if she wanted Derek or Addison.

"Why divorce him if you don't want to?" She asked softly,

"I do want to." Said Addison with full certainty, "It's just… It's like the day I married him. The day I married him I was one hundred percent sure it was what I wanted to do, he was who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. But then, as I was walking down the aisle I had a thought. I had a thought about you, about how I was getting married and my best friend couldn't be their because she was at medical school in Boston, and it was all wrong Meredith, it was so wrong to get married without having you there. But then he turned around and looked at me and he smiled. He gave me the true smile, the smile of Prince Charming, the _smile_! I can't even think of how to describe it properly."

"The McDreamy smile."

"_Yes!_ God. The McDreamy smile, Mere. And everything fell into place. So now…" She sighed, "I'm just having a thought as I walk down the aisle."

Meredith nodded once, "Waiting for the smile?" She asked,

Addison seemed to understand Meredith knew who she wanted to be smiling, "Look, I don't want someone who doesn't want me, Meredith. But if there's the slightest chance that you want me in the way I want you, I'm not leaving Seattle."

She left the scrub room leaving Meredith to look after her.

* * *

Derek sat down at Joe's bar; Bailey was sitting to his right,

"Everything's gonna be fine. Addison will go back to New York. Meredith and I'll start over, everything's gonna be fine. Right?" He said, mainly to him self,

"You so damn stupid." She muttered,

_tbc..._

**Review? Please?**


	6. I'm In Love With You

**Chapter Six – I'm In Love With You**

"Dr. Bailey. Henry Lamott, age 42," Cristina said as the group were in their first room for rounds, "is scheduled with Dr. Shepherd for a spinal implant..." Her voice trailed off as Mr. Lamott turned the volume of the TV up, the sound of woman laughing and giggling filled the room.

"...to control the pain of his herniated disc. Is allergic to all pain medication..." Everyone but Bailey was staring at the screen, "Is that...?"

"Porn." Said Mrs Lamott simply,

"Porn?" Asked Bailey, she looked at the TV, "As in Porn?!"

"All right." Smirked Alex, "What are we watching?"

"Karev! Go stand in the hall."

Alex left and Bailey addressed the patient and his wife, distracted by the TV, "Uh, Mr. & Mrs. Lamott, I'm sure you are really nice people, and what you do in the privacy of your own ... Look, we can't have porn in here. This is a hospital."

"It's for my pain. My doc says it releases endorphins in the brain and helps keep my pain at a manageable level." Said Mr Lamott,

"Really?"

"George! Hall!"

"What is this?" Asked Izzie, clearly amused,

"Nasty, Naughty Nurses," Said Mrs Lamott, "… four." She said, after checking the TV,

Meredith, Cristina and Izzie all tilted their heads as they looked at the screen,

"That does not look comfortable." Commented Cristina as they watched two of the nasty, naughty, nurses 'play doctor'.

"Trust me." said Meredith, "It's not."

Cristina and Izzie stared at her,

"Get in the hall!" Yelled Bailey,

* * *

Meredith was walking through a corridor when Addison walked over to her, "Hey, have you seen Derek?"

"No, but I'm on his service today, I'll let him know you're looking."

"Thanks sweetie." Smiled Addie,

"I'm not gonna be that woman." Meredith said suddenly,

"What?"

"I'm not gonna be that woman; the woman who breaks up a marriage, or begs you to want me. He'll sign the papers or he won't. Either way, when it comes to my relationship with him, I'm out. And it's only fair if the same applies-" Addison stoped Meredith talking by covering her mouth with her hand.

"He will sign Meredith. He will sign and everything will work out."

Meredith nodded, "Ok." She wanted to kiss her, but they were in the middle of the hospital and everyone knew about the McDreamy has a wife and a girlfriend; they just didn't know that the wife and the girlfriend had a very... close, past.

* * *

It was when she was in surgery Meredith knew who she wanted. She was working with Derek on a young girl Anna, and she felt it. She looked up and saw he kept glancing at her, but that wasn't what Meredith felt. She felt Addison's gaze, and looked up into the gallery to meet it.

In the scrub room Meredith waited until Derek had left, and Addison walked in.

"I lied." Meredith said, "There's no way I'm out-"

"Meredith-"

"No!"

"Mere." Said Addie more forcefully, "I'm going to say something, and I wasn't going to but I feel like you're slipping away from me, I feel like you're going to fall right back into his arms with your ooh-he's-a-brain-surgeon doe eyes."

"Addison-"

"Shut up." yelled Addison, "I can not get out of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in, it's humiliating because here I am begging! And here it is. Your choice is simple, Meredith." Addison started getting a bit teary, "Him or me. And I know he can be great, but from his soon to be ex-wife, it doesn't last! And Meredith, I'm sorry, I wasn't going to go there but I love you … I'm in love with you ... in a really, really big; laugh at your bad jokes, play nice with the friends I don't like, let you eat the last piece of chocolate cake, hold a boom-box over my head outside your window; unfortunate way that makes me almost hate you, love you." She sighed, "So please, Baby, pick _me_. Choose _me _… _Love. Me_."

Meredith lent forward and pulled Addison into her arms, kissing her deeply. She lent her forehead to Addie's and whispered, "I've always loved you Adds, I've loved you over everything."

Addison grinned, "Can we go to the bar across the road and get you over your rebound?"

Meredith laughed, "You want our first date to be spent hitting on guys?"

Addison wiped left over tears from her face, "Yea, let's just sleep our way through the drama, and then start fresh."

"Fresh." Agreed Meredith, and they made their way out of the scrub room together.

* * *

They walked into the bar together, chatting animatedly, and catching up completely over the last few years. Meredith was comparing their mission of sleeping through the drama to when she slept her way through Europe with her friend Sadie.

They went to the bar and ordered two beers which Joe gave them; they sat at the bar, enjoying each other's company and pointing out guys that were watching them. It wasn't much later two guys started buying them all shots and the night's fun began.

**tbc**

**REVIEW!!  
**


	7. I'm Not So Far Away

_Hey guys. So i'm going on a bit of a new scheme. I'm not gonna post until a story is finished... but since i already started posting this i'll probably continue but at a slower rate. _

**Chapter Seven – I'm Not So Far Away**

Cristina, Izzie and George were at Joe's bar watching as Meredith and Addison hit on the two guys flirting with them. Meredith was clearly drunk as she and the guy she was currently sitting on kept doing shots. Addison was holding her barely started second beer.

"So they're like friends now?" Asked Cristina as she pulled the darts of the board and handed them to George,

"They've known each other for a while." George said, "You heard what Meredith's mum said."

"You believe that? Meredith doesn't have a kid, and her mum has Alzheimer's she talks nothing."

"I think its true." said Izzie, "I mean think about it. Addison was talking to Meredith's mum about the baby."

"Baby, Pfft! there's no baby." Muttered Cristina,

"There could be a baby." Said George,

The room was suddenly full of beeping, people all around checked pagers,

"Joe, turn up the TV!" Yelled someone in the bar,

On the TV was the news, "_A massive train wreck occurred just outside of Seattle just minutes ago._"

Cristina looked at her pager, "911."

"We just worked a 30 hour shift." Complained Izzie,

"I don't have any clean underwear."

"_The Vancouver-bound train was carrying over 300 passengers._"

"Looks ugly." Commented Joe,

"_Paramedics are on scene helping victims_."

Meredith and Addie groaned, "Sorry boys, we have to go save some lives."

Andrew and Matt let out groans, "We'll see you later?" Asked Matt,

"Yea." Smiled Addie, kissing his cheek,

"Bye." Said Meredith, Andrew pulled her in and kissed her deeply,

"I think you've had too much to drink."

"I'll keep an eye on her." Smiled Addison, "Come on Mere."

* * *

"Ow." said Meredith, "Ow. Ow."

The curtain Meredith sat behind was pulled back, "What're you doing?" Asked Izzie,

"Trying to insert my banana bag. Which sounds vaguely dirty but it isn't."

Izzie pulled the curtain closed, "I can do it."

"So, how's going with Addison?" asked Meredith, "Good mood? Bad mood? Why the hell won't my husband sign the papers mood?"

"Ah I think it's the more of the 'I hate the smell of charred flesh' mood."

"Before you judge me. I know there was a train accident. People are very badly hurt. And that I'm a vapid narcissist when you mix me with alcohol. In case you were wondering. I know that."

"Well, for what it's worth, I take issue with her salmon coloured scrubs. I mean what self respecting surgeon wears salmon coloured scrubs?"

Meredith laughed, "Yeah."

* * *

"So have you made a decision yet, Dr. Stevens?" Addie asked,

"I'm sorry?" Asked Izzie as they walked to the nurses station,

"Whether or not you're going to," She paused, "hate me." Izzie looked up, "You're Meredith's friend. I'm the wicked witch who came in and ruined her life and cheated on doctor... Wait what is it that you guys call him?"

"McDreamy." Izzie muttered uncomfortably,

"Right." She smiled, "God, doesn't that embarrass you?"

"Yeah. I think it does."

"Yeah well by all rights, you should hate me." Addison told her,

"I guess."

"Except Mere is my closet friend. We've been through a lot and I'm going to be staying in town for a while."

"You are?"

"Yes. And you show a real gift with my specialty. And I have a lot to teach if you wanna learn. ...So?"

"So?"

"_So_, when you decide how important it is for you to hate me, let me know." Addison smiled and walked away,

* * *

After working all night and all day Izzie, Meredith and George went home; they opened the door and heard rushed footsteps. Addison came rushing down the stairs in Meredith's Dartmouth shirt and black work out shorts.

"Mere, is that you?" She called out as she made her way down the stairs, she looked up and saw George and Izzie staring.

Meredith smiled and walked to the kitchen with her, "Has he signed yet?"

"He's signed." Grinned Addison, "I'm free as the wind."

Izzie and George made their way upstairs.

"So what, she's moving in now?" Asked Izzie,

George shrugged, "Where's she gonna sleep?" Just as he said that he noticed the ladder leading to the attic was down,

"This is going to be strange."

**Review please.**

**Also check out this video trailer i made for another Grey's fic i'm writing. It's AU and a cross over with Criminal Minds. Mer/Der and Mer/Reid...**

http : // www DOT youtube DOT com / watch?v=h6wnOfB5alE


	8. I Just Need You Here

_Hey guys! so i want to thank all my reviewers. Sorry this has been a while but i had writers block :( and i have exams for the next few days, so i need to study. Should be another chap up in a week or so._

_This is set during 2x07 'Something To Talk About'  
_

**Chapter Eight – I Just Need You Here**

"She didn't even know he was married." a blonde intern gossiped, "I mean, his wife just shows up and he dumps her. I heard she flipped out."

"What does she expect? She got what she deserved." Said another, "Dating an attending!"

"Dating McDreamy. Have you seen his hair? No guy is that perfect." Said the blonde,

"I think it's kinda sad." said a guy, "She has to work here. With him. With her. Everyone knows."

* * *

The interns and Bailey walked into their patient's room.

"Grey." said Bailey, "Present."

Meredith picked up the chart, "Tamara Jones, 25, presented with-"

"Grey? Meredith Grey?" Meredith looked up,

"T.J?"

"Doctor Grey." Said Bailey,

"Uh, right. Presented-"

"No. No! Get out!" Yelled Tamara,

"Is there a problem?"

"I don't want her anywhere near me."

Bailey raised her eyebrows at the patient, "And why is that?"

"I went to high school with her. She's a whore. You hear me, Meredith Grey? You're a whore!"

Everyone looked at Meredith,

"Look TJ..."

"No! No! You ruined him!" Tamara turned to Bailey, "She cheated on my brother, got herself pregnant then expected sympathy from everyone! She's a whore!"

Meredith swallowed a lump in her throat and left the room, everyone staring after her.

"You know she didn't even keep the kid?" Tamara said, "Her mother came to visit and Meredith dumped the baby in her arms and walked away."

"Ms Jones, I'm sure you have your reasons, but Dr. Grey is a respected surgeon in this hospital. We can't have her being publicly harassed like this." Bailey told Tamara,

"Not that respected." Muttered Alex,

Bailey gave him a look and he shut up.

"You." She said to Karev, "You're with Shepherd."

He looked at her,

"Go. Now!" He left.

"Izzie, you're here."

"But-"

"Here." Said Bailey, "O'Malley you're with Dr. Burke."

George nodded and left,

"Yang. Find Grey."

* * *

Cristina found Meredith in the empty intern locker room, she was wiping tears onto her sleaves.

"Meredith?"

Meredith didn't look up; she just spoke in a small voice "She doesn't know anything. No one knows anything."

"Meredith come on."

Mere nodded and looked at Cristina, "Why'd you want me before rounds?"

Cristina smiled, "We have a case."

* * *

Cristina had shown Meredith a case she'd stolen, Shane Herman, a pregnant man. Unfortunately Bailey had found out.

"Do not think for a moment," she said, as she looked at Cristina and Meredith in the crowded room, "I condone stealing patients. That said ... way to go."

"The first pregnancy test I took was a joke, to make Tina laugh." Shane smiled at Addison, who was giving him an ultrasound,

"We didn't think it would lead to ... you know, this." Said Tina, his pregnant wife,

"Mr. Herman," Smiled Addie, "I can assure you, you are in no way pregnant."

"Whew. It's a relief to hear it, you know officially." Shane said as Addison started making her way through the crowd of people. She passed Meredith and gave her a small smile.

* * *

Izzie stood in Tamara Jones' room. It was a very simple, boring, yet surgical case.

"I've heard them talking." said Tamara, "About her."

"Who." Said Izzie, not really interested,

"The nurses, and orderlies, and everyone. They're talking about her. Meredith Grey." She smiled triumphantly, "I knew it. I knew she really was a slut."

Izzie raised an eyebrow.

"She always will be." Said Tamara, "She's been sleeping with Dr. McDreamy, who ever that is. But it doesn't matter. He's _married_."

"Not anymore."

"Exactly!" said Tamara, "As soon as he's serious she leaves! She broke up a marriage and she doesn't even want to be with the guy."

Izzie gave her patient a look, "You don't know anything about it." She left the room,

* * *

Addison stood with Richard in the gallery, looking over at a preparation for surgery.

"I can't stop wishing I lived here, Richard." She sighed, "Just picking up everything and moving here!"

The chief smiled, "You should stay Addison. For me. For yourself."

"Richard, I-"

"In Seattle you can be front page news. With your reputation and the money I'm willing to put in promoting you. Seattle Grace will become one of the foremost neonatal hospitals west of Manhattan."

Addison smiled shyly; Richard stared at her, her expression changed.

"You're serious?"

"I'm ready to put my money where my mouth is."

* * *

Derek walked down a hallway; he paused, looking at Meredith as she stood alone at the nurse's station writing in a chart. He started to walk to her, but was cut off by Bailey.

"Turn around. Walk away." She said,

"From what?"

"From my intern."

"But I wasn't." Derek said smugly,

"Uh yeah! Yes you were. Come on, look. You can't do this. You don't have the right. Not anymore."

"I just wanna find out if she's okay."

"No she's not! She's a human traffic accident and everybody is slowing down to look at the wreckage. She's doing the best she can with what she has left. Look I know you can't see this because you're in it but you can't help her now. It'll only make it worse. Walk away. Leave her to mend." He didn't move, "_Go on_."

* * *

Everyone knew. Everyone knew Tamara Jones' version of Meredith's teen pregnancy. Everyone spoke about how she cheated on her boyfriend. How she dumped a baby with her mother. How she got drunk every few nights and went to every party. How she came on to most of her senior year. How she was a whore that would never change.

Derek had stoped looking at her.

* * *

Meredith walked to Shane's room. It was packed full of people and Cristina and Izzie were taking money from people as they took photos and talked and laughed.

"What is going on in here?" yelled Meredith, "Everybody out! Out!" Meredith walked further into the room,

"Mr. Herman is a patient! A surgical patient who's sick and embarrassed! And tired of being stared at!" She turned to Cristina and Izzie "You two! This isn't a zoo! Out! Out! Out!" She was waving everyone out the door,

"You know if all of you want to point and whisper and stare at me, knock yourselves out! _Look at Meredith, isn't she sad and pathetic and a huge slut. Maybe she's gone mental_, maybe I have! But leave Mr. Herman alone!" Meredith walked after the last few people in the room, and glaring at Cristina she said, "You should be ashamed of yourself!" They left and Meredith closed the door, noticing Derek watching her.

"And what the hell do you want?" she glared at him.

Addison looked on from the opposite side of the hall, people passing her. Whispering.

"She sleeps with Shepherd and thinks she can get away with anything."

"Yea, cause she's Ellis Grey's daughter."

"What a skank. Did you hear what that patient on third was saying?"

"She got pregnant in high school."

"I heard she never knew who the father was. Slept with two guys at once, then didn't bother finding out."

"I heard she dumped the baby on the hospital door step."

"It was at her prom night too."

Addison glared at them and snapped; she stormed through the crowd and made her way to Tamara's room.

"You're Tamara Jones?" she demanded.

"Yes." Said Tamara, "Who are you?"

Addison didn't answer her question, "What right do you have?"

"Excuse me?"

"What right, exactly, do you have to spread lies about Meredith Grey through a hospital where she's already been crushed?!"

"That bitch broke my brother's heart!"

"You know nothing about her!" exclaimed Addison, "Meredith Grey never did anything wrong! You have no idea what she went through! She was so ashamed of something that she had no control over!" Addison was yelling now, "And to spread rumours about her past that are in no way true, is immature! It has been eight years since she had that baby! Get over it!"

Tamara was staring at Addison, "What about now." She said, slightly shakily, "She broke up a marriage."

"She was never told he was married until his wife came in and divorced him! She had every right to be upset, heartbroken and hurt, yet no one is on her side!"

"_She's a slut!_" Yelled Tamara loudly,

Addison glared at the woman, and hissed her next words harshly and quietly, "She was raped. You might want to think about that before you judge her."

Addison stormed out of the room to find everyone in the halls had stoped, hearing all the yelling, Meredith stood alone in one of the hallways, tears in her eyes. Addison walked slowly to her, not sure if she would be angry.

Meredith wrapped her arms around Addison in a small hug before letting go and running away quickly.

"Addison." Said Derek as he walked up,

"Leave it alone Derek. So she didn't tell you she had a kid, you didn't tell her you had a wife. You were in the wrong, she wasn't."

**Review!!! (Because, they, like Mer/Add, are love)  
**


	9. Love Will Take Us There

_Here's the next chap! (Schools almost out, now i'm done with exams._ YAY. _So I'll be able to write more often. If i can, however, is another question.)_

this is set, btw, in 2x08, 'Let It Be'

**Chapter Nine – Love Will Take Us There**

Meredith lay on the extremely comfortable couch in the flashy living room that wasn't hers.

She was at Chris and Nate's house, baby sitting her daughter. The two of them were watching Toy Story 2 and Mindy had her head resting in Meredith's lap. Mindy closed her eyes and let out a long yawn.

"Someone's tired." Smiled Meredith,

"No." Said Mindy suddenly, waking her self up, "No, you said I could stay up."

Meredith laughed, "I did, but it's getting a bit too late, and you haven't had dinner yet."

"I'm not hungry." Mumbled Mindy,

"It's your favourite." Meredith temped,

Mindy made a face, "I don't want dinner. I have a tummy ache."

"A tummy ache?" Meredith frowned and placed a hand to her daughter's forehead, "You have a fever."

"I'm staying up." Mindy said forcefully,

"Sick little girls go to bed."

Mindy pouted, "But I don't wann-_aahh._" She yawned through her words, and let Meredith pick her up and carry to her room.

Meredith set Mindy down in bed, and helped her pull the cover up, tucking her in.

"Sleep well. Do you want some water?"

Mindy shook her head and opened her arms, signalling she wanted a hug. Meredith obliged, sitting down on the edge of the bed, and leaning over Mindy.

"Night, Mummy."

"Night Mindy." Meredith whispered, kissing Mindy's forehead before she got up and left the room.

When Mindy woke early the next morning, she was still in pain, and still felt tired and sick. Chris walked into the room,

"Mindy, princess, are you feeling better? Mummy said you were sick last night."

Mindy sat up, and promptly vomited onto the carpet of her room.

"Nate!" Called Chris and his partner came to the door, "Minds' is still sick, I'm going to take her to the doctor's, call them please."

Nate nodded and left to make the phone call, he came rushing back to the room after five minutes.

"The doctor agreed to see us early, before his first patient, we should leave now."

They quickly got Mindy dressed in loose clothes and got into the car, driving carefully, Nate in the back to keep an eye on their daughter.

* * *

Meredith was sitting in her car playing with her hair, trying to get her fringe to cover a huge pimple on her forehead. Feeling someone looking at her, Meredith looked up to see Addison standing outside her own car.

Addie walked around Meredith's car and opened the driver door, leaning against it.

"Cute fringe." She smiled,

Meredith groaned, "It's really obvious, isn't it?"

Addison laughed, "Here." She took a band-aid from Meredith's hand and started to open it. "Hold your hair back." Addison smoothed the band-aid down then pressed a kiss to it making Meredith blush.

Meredith's cell rang. "Hello?" She answered, "Nate? How's Mindy- _Appendicitis_- wait you're at Seattle Grace? But-" She sighed, as she and Addie started to walk to the hospital, "Ok. Ok. But no one knows who she is… they know about her. Kind of… Well they know I have a child. …Yes, that's about it. Ok. Thanks Nate." She hung up and looked at Addison, "Mindy's inside, she's getting her appendix out this afternoon."

"Great." Smiled Addison, "Well not _great_, but I love seeing Mindy."

"Go visit her now; I won't be able to until my lunch break probably."

Addie nodded as they walked through the doors and into the hospital.

She made her through the hallways until she found Mindy's room, Addison walked in and gave Chris and Nate pecks on the cheeks.

"She's asleep." Whispered Nate,

Addie nodded with a smiled, a kissed the girl's forehead.

"Get a nurse to page me when she wakes up." she smiled, "Meredith will come by at lunch."

She left the room, and was making her way to find Bailey when she saw an old friend…

"Sav!" She grinned, opening her arms as she walked, embracing the woman walking toward her, "Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

* * *

The day was long, and Meredith never got a chance to go and look in on Mindy. She knew that the surgery was postponed until the morning, however. She was hoping to catch her now, while she had some time to spare.

Meredith walked to an elevator, only to find Derek leaning in a corner. She ignored him.

"So," He said, "apparently we both live on this elevator." When she didn't reply he walked to her, "Meredith. You know, you could at least acknowledge I exist."

Meredith let her eyes find his briefly, as the elevator stoped with a ding and Addison walked on.

Addison smiled, "Meredith, I'm going out with one of my friends, Savvy, and her husband and, uh, and Derek."

Meredith raised her eyebrows,

"Do you want to…?" She trailed off as Meredith shook her head,

"I have to see Mindy."

"Mindy?" Asked Derek,

Meredith ignored him, "Her surgery isn't until tomorrow now, I want to see her before."

Addison nodded then turned to Derek, "You're ready?"

"I was on my way."

The elevator stopped and Meredith kissed Addie's cheek quickly and walked off.

"Why is she getting off at Paediatrics?" Asked Derek,

* * *

Meredith walked through the hallway until she found Mindy's room. Mindy was crying silently.

"What's wrong?" Meredith asked as she walked in,

"Oh thank God." said Chris, "She's wanted you all day. But we didn't want to cause any more… awkwardness."

Meredith nodded slightly, walking to her daughter, "Mindy baby. It's Mummy."

Mindy rolled over and flung her arms around Meredith.

"Mummy I'm scared."

"Of the surgery?"

Mindy shook her head, "I want it out now." She whispered,

Meredith felt her heart twinge. "Mindy, I have to go to a patient, but I promise I'll come back." Mindy looked horrified at the thought, "It won't take long." Meredith smiled and kissed Mindy's forehead, "I'll be back soon."

It was about twenty minutes later that Meredith went back to Mindy's room. She climbed into the bed and under the covers, holding Mindy close and falling into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

The next morning Meredith was woken by Chris as the paediatric surgeon arrived to take Mindy to pre-op.

She made her way to an elevator and waited until it opened. Addison was inside.

"You weren't home…"

"I was with Mindy."

Addison nodded slowly. Meredith's hair was messy, she had obviously only just woken up.

"What?" Meredith asked, noticing Addie staring,

"Nothing just…" Addison smiled slowly, "I just… You're amazing."

There was a silence.

"I love you." Meredith said,

"I-" Addison went to say, but Meredith kissed her softly just before the elevator stoped and Meredith walked off.

**REVIEW (oh and so u don't get confused, they are not -yet- together, but review anyway.)  
**


	10. You're Always What I Want

_set in 'Thanks For The Memories' 2x09_

**Chapter Ten - You're Always What I Want**

Addison woke early on thanks giving morning. Izzie was standing over her bed holding out coffee.

"Stevens?" groaned Addison, "It's my day off."

"Exactly." said Izzie, "You are going to help with dinner."

"Oh." said Addie, "Now?"

"Yes."

"Right." Addison sat up and accepted the cup from Izzie, drinking deeply. When she finished she handed the mug back with a thank you then stood and pulled on a pair of loose sweat pants.

Izzie looked away awkwardly before walking down the attic steps into the main hallway, Addison following behind her.

"Where is Meredith?"

"Having a shower, but she'll-" Izzie's answer was cut off as Addison walked straight into the bathroom, the noise of the shower still going.

In the bathroom Addison opened the shower door and leaned against the wall, smiling at Meredith.

"Hey you." She grinned, "You going into work?"

"I am."

Addie nodded, "So umm, I was thinking we could …have sex tonight."

Meredith laughed, "How long has it been?" She asked,

Addison ignored this, "Look I know it'll be a bit… different. It's the first time..."

"Since Mark."

"And Derek... I have the day off."

"I don't." Said Meredith, "I'm not really-"

"In the mood." smiled Addie, "You've never liked Thanks Giving. But, I know how to make it better."

"Oh?" asked Mere, "How?"

"I was thinking we could have sex tonight." Meredith laughed but Addie took a step forward, closer to the shower, "Or…" she grinned, "we could have sex now."

Meredith stoped the stream of the shower and stepped out of the shower.

"I have to get to work."

Addison nodded, "Yeah."

Meredith wrapped a towel around her dripping wet body and walked Addison back into the wall. Their mouths met, Addison grinned and pulled Meredith as close to her body as possible. The kiss was long, passionate, and left Addison with a hickey.

When Addison fully recovered she headed back to her room in the attic to pull on fresh clothes, careful to make sure the hickey wasn't visible.

She was walking down the stairs to help Izzie when three loud male voices yelled '_O'Malley!_' and she had to run back up the stairs so she wouldn't be run over.

Later in the morning Cristina and Burke waited outside Meredith's house.

"Don't mention Shepherd." She said, "Or Montgomery."

"Ok."

"Or the fact that Montgomery seems to have moved in and none of us know why."

"Ok."

"Or anything having to do with syphilis."

Burke laughed lightly, "I've been in social situations before."

"Yeah well not with me."

* * *

"I'm in hell." George said into his phone as he tried to avoid his family,

"I'm the one in hell. Burke's going all Iron Chef in your kitchen with Izzie and Montgomery. Get your ass back here and save me." Cristina told George as she looked through cupboards,

"I'm in the woods with shotguns, and liquor and car talk. It's like deliverance out here."

"Well at least you've got liquor. Where does Meredith keep the booze?"

"Uh, I don't think she has any."

"How's that possible? She's a wasp. Liquor is like oxygen to a wasp."

"Addison seems to be able to control her… waspiness. Listen, can you come and get me?"

"Ok how am I supposed to get through the holidays without liquor George?!" Yelled Cristina and she hung up,

"Just come and get me! Cris- hello?" George realised he was talking to air and hung up, "Selfish!"

* * *

Addison was at the hospital. She wanted to tell Meredith to meet her at a hotel.

"Dr. Yang?" Addison said as she walked out of the elevator, "You're getting liquor here?" She joked lightly,

"Um...yes?"

Addison nodded, "Have you seen Meredith?"

"No, I have not." Cristina said stiffly and awkwardly,

"Do you know where she is?"

"No, I do not."

"Well if you see her…" Addison trailed off and sighed,

"I'm not here."

"Neither am I." Addison said again, pulling out her cell phone and walking away.

* * *

Meredith sat alone at the bar in Joe's thinking about a Thanks Giving years ago when a voice leaned over her shoulder.

"This seat taken?"

The guy was attractive. Meredith was about to open her mouth when another voice said;

"Yea it is." Addie walked paced the guy and sat down, she kissed Meredith softly on the lips then smiled and said, "Hey Mere."

"Hi Addie." Meredith took her hand and they entwined fingers,

"Ready to go?"

"One more drink."

After the one drink Meredith and Addison made their way to a nice hotel Addie had booked for them.

When they came to their room they walked inside, leaving the lights off. Addison pulled Meredith's jacket and shirt off and Mere made work of Addie's pants. Soon enough they were both in just their underwear, stumbling towards the bed.

They fell to the bed, Addison half over Meredith.

Addie smiled and kissed Mere softly, brushing Meredith's hair back with her fingers.

"Happy Thanks Giving."

Meredith burst into tears.

"Mere?"

"I'm sorry Addie. I get it. You like Thanks Giving, I know. So I didn't really think you'd remember but-"

"Oh God." Addison said, rolling over, sitting up and pulling Meredith into her arms. "Oh God."

"It's ok." said Meredith, wiping her eyes. She stoped sobbing, and gave a fake smile, "I'm fine."

"I'm so sorry Mere."

"It's fine Addie." Meredith told her, "How about we just sleep, ok?"

Addison nodded.

She didn't go to sleep straight away. She couldn't. At moment she hated herself. November 24th. How could she have forgotten? Yes it was Thanks Giving, and yes that had taken over her mind while trying to be helpful to Izzie and Burke and romantic to Mere but there was no excuse. November 24th. Nine years today since Meredith's innocence was ripped from her and she was left pregnant and alone and scared.

Addison lay down and pulled Meredith into her arms, breathing in her scent and listening to the steady snores.

"You're who I want to spend the rest of my life with." She whispered into the crook of Meredith's neck, pressing a soft kiss to the exposed skin, "I love you."

**review :)**


	11. Have You Ever Wondered?

_Sorry i haven't updated in a while but i got caught up in Addison/Sam on Private Practice and i needed to rest my Grey's brain. _

_this is set in 2x10 Much Too Much  
_

**Chapter 11 – Have You Ever Wondered?**

Her skin was so smooth, and soft, softer then anything else in the world. Her hands were small and delicate, tracing sensational circles with perfect finger tips.

Soft breathes filled with satisfaction and moans only her lover could cause her to let go.

Kisses trailing from her lips, along her jaw and nibbling her earlobe. Nipping and kissing down her neck, sucking at pulse points and moving down. Lips caressing breasts, and peppering kisses lower. As Meredith reached her goal Addison's hips bucked and she let out a long moan rolled over and woke as she hit the floor with a bang.

"Oww." She groaned.

She'd been having that dream quite a bit lately.

On the floor below Meredith woke. Next to her lay the one night stand she'd picked up at Joe's. Carefully and quietly, Meredith got up and pulled on her robe. She heard footsteps coming from the attic and soon enough she was met by Addison.

"Hey." Addison grinned,

Meredith smiled softly and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her, "Hey."

Addison took Meredith hand and led her to the bathroom. Once there she kissed Meredith soundly and deeply, making Meredith go weak in the knees.

Meredith's cell phone started to ring and Meredith slipped out of Addison grasp and grabbed her phone from the landing.

"Hello?" Meredith said sitting on the stairs to the attic; Addison walked to her and settled herself on Meredith's lap, straddling her.

Addison didn't really notice they were out in the open and Izzie or George could easily find them. And she didn't really care Meredith was on the phone. So she lent forward and let Mere's scent intoxicate her into acting irrationally.

Meredith bit back a moan as Addie kissed and nipped at her neck.

"What was that?" Asked Cristina who was on the other end of the phone,

"Nothing."

"I heard something."

"I have a boy in my bed." Meredith said simply,

"God." Cristina hung up,

Meredith hung up and dropped her cell, and took Addie in a searing kiss.

Addie broke it. "Damn, I have to go into work early." She stole another kiss from Meredith's lips and jumped up, heading to the shower.

Meredith gaped after her. She'd forgotten how much of a tease Addison could be. She picked up the phone and called Cristina's cell. She sat in her room talking quietly on the phone until Steve woke up.

"Who are you talking to?" He asked,

"Uh- I gotta go." Meredith shut her cell with a snap.

She stood and held her robe close to her body.

"Uh, I have to go take a shower and when I get back you won't be here so um, goodbye... Steve." She left with a nod.

Steve got up and pulled on his clothes hurriedly, as he left Meredith's room he came face to face with Addison, who was dripping wet and dressed in only a towel.

"Oh, uh, hi." Steve said,

"Who are you?"

"Uh, Steve."

Addison looked at him sharply, "Leave."

Steve ran down the stairs and Addison heard the door slam. She went to her room and dressed quickly grabbing her favourite brown sweater; once dressed she grabbed her cell and pager then headed to the kitchen. She made herself coffee and toast and sat at the table with George and Izzie.

"I'm going into the hospital early today, either of you want a lift?"

They both declined and the rest of the breakfast was eaten in an awkward silence. Meredith walked into the kitchen as Addison finished her toast. Mere gave Izzie a nod, who was smirking at the hickey on her neck. Addison gave a small smirk as well, knowing Steve didn't put it there like Izzie and George obviously thought.

Addie downed her coffee and left, today was going to be a good day. Officiating her position at Seattle Grace and she had the mother-to-be of quintuplets.

* * *

Later that day, at the hospital, George ran into the stair weld and up some stairs, he turned on the mid-landing. Meredith was sitting at the bottom of the next stairs.

He looked down at his feet awkwardly then back up, "You hear about the quints?" He asked,

"Yeah. I heard." Meredith said

"Yeah I gotta get in on that."

"Yeah well that's Addison." She looked away, "She's been acting strange."

"So how do you break a guy's penis?" Asked George suddenly,

Steve had turned up at the hospital with priapism. Meredith gave George a look and he sat on the step below her.

"You know about Steve? Why does every guy I meet come with his own unique set of nightmarish humiliations?"

"Um, maybe it's a matter of volume?"

"Volume!?" Meredith snapped, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just, you know there's quality and there's quantity."

"So you think I'm sleeping with too many guys?" Meredith challenged, "You think I'm some kind of slut?"

"I think you're taking some risks." George clarified. "I think you find yourself in a hole in some guy's basement, being ordered to put the lotion on the skin or else you'll get the hose again."

"Oh come on." Meredith said over him,

"Excuse me I'm talking." George said forcefully, "So you're not over Derek. You want to be but you're not. So try and find some replacement, some temporary way to feel better and it's not working and it's not going to work because future meaningless one night stands and problematic penises is not what you want. You want better and you deserve better… And not every guy's a nightmare." He added as he walked away,

Meredith groaned and got up.

* * *

When Mere saw Addison in a patient's room she walked in and closed the door.

"We need to talk about this morning." She said.

Addison looked up, "Now?"

"Yes." said Meredith, "It's humiliating. Steve's here. I broke him and it's not fixing."

Addison turned, "You broke him?"

"He's got priapism." Meredith noticed the heavily pregnant patient. "Oh. You're busy… Quints… Right. I'll go."

"It's fine." smiled the patient, "I'm Dorie."

"Dr. Grey." Said Meredith,

Addison gave Meredith a smile, "Well what's wrong?"

"I broke him, except nothings working and I went through the most horrifying Neuro consult."

Addison snorted, "Derek?"

Meredith nodded and sat down in a chair, "Ok, that's it. No more random guys."

At that Addison grinned, "And all it took was a one-night-stand from hell."

"Shut up." Meredith told her. She sighed, "Has it been long enough?"

Addison smirked, "Oh I don't know Meredith."

Meredith looked up then away, "Do you need any extra hands with this?"

"Yes, I told Stevens to tell you. We're going to need all the help we can get."

Meredith nodded, "Can I uh, can I talk to you outside for a second?"

Addison frowned, "Ok."

They walked from the room and stoped outside the window to Dorie's room. "What was that thing this morning?" Meredith asked quietly,

Addison smiled, "A small release of my frustration."

"So has it been long enough?"

Addison took Meredith's hand and gave it a squeeze, "Yes."

Meredith smiled and quickly scanned the area before leaning forward and kissing Addison softly on the lips.

At that one moment Meredith didn't care she was in what had to be one of the highest gossiping hospitals. But Addison, it seemed, did. She pulled out of the kiss and looked around, a small pinkish tinge taking her cheeks.

"To risky?" Asked Mere,

"Just a bit." Blushed Addison,

"You're embarrassed." Smiled Mere

Addison blushed a bit more.

"I'll see you at home." Mere smirked; she squeezed Addie's hand and walked away.

Addison bit her lip, going back into Dorie's room.

"You and her," smiled Dorie, "Make an adorable couple."

**review :):)  
**


	12. We Fall In Love

_here's the next chapter. it kinda skips over until the end of 2x14 :P_

**Chapter 12 – We Fall In Love**

Over a month had passed. Christmas had come and gone and the New Year had been welcomed in.

Meredith and Addison had been dating. They were going at a steady pace, they had starting things slow and they were steadily getting them selves prepared for a proper long relationship.

It was hard on them. They had always been affectionate; brought together because nobody else understood. Neither of them were used to secret relationships. Keeping it out of the hospital was fine; everyone had secrets from the hospital. But in their own home they couldn't be open about themselves. Even to the point they hadn't been able to make love, not at home or the hospital. And they couldn't go to a hotel because it would raise suspicions.

Addison was embarrassed. Not of Meredith but of what being with Meredith meant. And how Meredith somehow turned her into a lovey-dovey very coupley person.

Meredith's reasons were simpler. She didn't want any extra attention. The nurses at Seattle Grace would have a field day if the slutty intern starting screwing McDreamy's ex-wife.

Today Addison and Meredith had the day off and they were using it to take Mindy out. They decided (with much insistence on Mindy's part) to go ice-skating.

Meredith and Addison stepped onto the ice, Mindy had gone out ahead of them; her dads took her ice-skating often so she didn't need any assistance.

Addison and Meredith were sticking to the edges, skating around holding hands.

"This is nice." said Addison,

"Yeah, it is." Meredith squeezed Addie's hand,

Mindy skated over to them and looked at Meredith pleadingly, "Mum, can I have a candy bar from the vending machine?"

Meredith smiled, "Tell me how much they are."

Mindy went off and Addison laughed softly. The couple stopped skating and made their way to the edge, resting against the barrier.

"I love you." Addie smiled,

Meredith kissed her softly, "I love you too."

Addie grinned and started to skate again, pulling Meredith by the hand. They crossed the rink and walked off so they could meet Mindy by the vending machine. Mindy told her mother what she wanted and Meredith agreed, handing the money over.

After another hour or so they left the ice-skating rink so they could find somewhere to have some lunch. They were in the car driving around trying to find a place Addison had heard of when Mindy spoke up.

"Mummy?"

"Yes Mindy?" Meredith said, looking up into the rear-view mirror,

"Is Aunty Addison my mummy now too?"

Meredith swallowed and looked over at Addison who turned around in her seat to face Mindy, "Why do you say that Mindy?"

"You were kissing and my friend says that her mum and dad kiss and my daddies kiss sometimes and I saw you were kissing. Are you going to be my second mummy, Aunty Addison?"

Addison nodded and looked at Meredith who shrugged, "Do you want me to be your second mummy?"

Mindy grinned, "Yes."

"Well then, I don't see why I can't be your second mummy."

Meredith looked up into the rear-view mirror again, "But you'll have to wait until we tell you before you start calling Aunty Addison mummy. Ok sweetie?"

"How long?"

"We don't know, but I promise that we'll tell you first." Smiled Addison,

"Ok Mummy." giggled Mindy, "I mean Aunty Addison."

* * *

In the past couple of weeks Meredith, Addison, and Izzie had gained a dog but unfortunately they couldn't keep him.

Addison walked into the locker room to find the room occupied by only George, Meredith and Doc.

"Hey." She smiled,

George nodded at her and Meredith smiled back.

"Hey Addison."

Addie bent down and started to scratch Doc behind the ear, "Hey Doc, hey boy." Addison looked back up, "I know what we can do with him."

* * *

Meredith and Addison got out of the Jeep and Addison grabbed some things from the back seat as Meredith got Doc out of the back of the car. Derek walked out of his trailer to meet them.

"Hey Doc. Hey buddy. Welcome home." He said, bending down to pat his new pet,

"I brought his toys and his food." Addison told him, walking to the trailer's porch and placing them there.

"Here." Meredith handed the leash Doc was on to Derek. "Thanks for doing this. I know it's a lot to ask."

"It's fine." Derek smiled,

"So he chews everything. So don't leave anything out." Derek nodded, "He hates cats and small little yappy dogs. Oh," Meredith shook her head slightly, "not house broken."

"Oh!" Derek grinned, bemused,

"Probably should've told you that."

"Yeah."

"You don't have to do this you know?" Meredith told him after a pause,

"I got all this land. It's just going to waste." There was another awkward pause, "It's just a dog. It doesn't mean anything. He'll be a fine."

"Yeah. Ok. Goodnight."

"Bye Derek." Addison gave a small smile,

"Goodnight." Derek told them,

They started to walk back to the car and Derek noticed Meredith taking Addison's hand.

Derek walked Doc up to his trailer and turned to see Addison get into the passenger side of the Jeep and lean over to kiss Meredith softly on the lips. When they parted Meredith gave her a true grin and with that one gesture, Derek understood.

**so omg you should review :P**


	13. Why I Care

_Another update :):):) This has scenes from 2x15_

**Chapter 13 – Why I Care**

Bailey was away on Maternity Leave so Izzie, Alex, Cristina, and Meredith were waiting at a nurses station wondering who was going to be there replacement resident.

They all jumped when a loud voice yelled, "Yang!"

A young female doctor with a huge cheesy grin on her face came down the stairs, "Stevens, Grey, O'Malley, Karev!"

She bounded her way over to them, "Here you are! I was looking for you guys in the locker room but you weren't there and then I thought well maybe my interns are looking for me too and then I come out her and here you are." She laughed, "Yeah."

The interns stared at her, Cristina was horrified, "You guys look like a great group; which is awesome! Because my horoscope said it's going to be a very challenging day and I was a little worried but no you guys, " She grinned, "...yeah, you look like a good group. Which is great! Because we're going to have so much fun! Hi!" She held out her arms and hugged Cristina, "Hi, First of all hi! Hi."

Cristina tensed, "Ow, ow, ow."

The doctor let go looking worried, "Ooh, sorry, am I hurting you?"

"Ah, no you're, you're touching me."

"I'm Sydney Heron." Sydney said after a second, "4th Year and my philosophy just so you know," she became a bit serious, "is um is heal with love." Alex and Izzie raised their eyebrows and Sydney became cheery again, "Ok, so wonderful. So, Alex, Izzie, Meredith, Cristina and our little group is just missing-"

"O'Malley. Yeah he's cowering behind the strike line like a little girl."

The nurses had gone on strike and George refused to walk passed them into the hospital.

"Standing up for what he believes in, that's my kind of little girl. Right? So ... The E.R needs somebody down there for a consult, does anybody ... who wants to ..."

"We get to pick?" Asked Meredith,

"Oh me, I'll, I'm on it." Cristina said hurriedly,

"I'll help." Said Alex, and they both rushed off,

"I have patients I need to check on." Meredith said, walking in the opposite direction,

This left Izzie by herself with Sydney, "So it looks like it's just you and me, Izzie McGee."

Izzie gave an awkward forced chuckle, "Right, right, it's ah, It's ah Stevens. It's Izzie Stevens."

"Oh, no I knew. I was just rhyming." Sydney explained,

"Oh, rhyming right, yeah. That's, that's neat..."

Addison walked over holding a chart.

"Dr. Stevens."

"Yeah?" Izzie answered eagerly,

"I could use you on a consult."

"Ok, I'm on it. Absolutely." She accepted the chart from Addison and walked away with her.

* * *

Later on in the morning Meredith was walking through the hospital when she bumped into Derek,

"Hey." Grinned Derek,

"Hey."

"Your dog's fine."

"He's your dog now." said Meredith, "I miss him."

Derek nodded and Addison walked over, "I miss him too."

"You should come visit." Derek offered, Meredith and Addison frowned slightly, "The dog I mean."

"I'm walking away now." Meredith said with a small smile, she walked passed them and Addison looked over at Derek,

"So I'm looking for a neurosurgeon to consult on a foetal spinal tumour." She told him, "You know anybody good?"

The rest of the day passed unpleasantly. Alex was sucking up to Sydney putting Cristina in the bad books and Meredith intubated a woman who turned out to be DNR. Izzie's consult with Addison turned out to be a pregnant teenage girl from her home town, which brought up old memories.

However George was having a good day. He had refused to cross the picket line so instead he joined the nurses outside in their strike, occasionally going into the hospital to check on their patients because they couldn't.

"She called me unkind." Cristina complained to Meredith, Izzie and Joe at the bar, "Unkind and lacking in compassion. In front of my boyfriend! I am not unkind."

"I think I have to kill a woman tomorrow." Meredith said, "I have to take out the tube that's keeping her alive."

They turned to Izzie; Cristina threw a peanut at her, "Izzie."

"This is the part where you say what's wrong with you." Joe said,

Izzie said nothing; instead she stood up and grabbed her bag and coat,

"Where are you going?" Asked Meredith,

"I have to go, I forgot something at work." Izzie left and Meredith turned back to the bar,

"I have to _kill_ a woman tomorrow." She said,

"And that's a problem, why?" Asked Cristina, "I mean if it's what she wants, it's what she wants! And that is not unkind or lacking in compassion. I'm a very compassionate person!"

Addison walked to the bar and sat down in Izzie's old seat, next to Meredith, "What are we talking about?"

Meredith turned to her, "I have to kill a woman tomorrow."

"Hey!" Cristina lent on the bar to get a better look at Addison, "Doctor Montgomery, do you think I'm unkind or lacking in compassionate?"

Addison thought, "Well, I wouldn't say so. But…"

"But?"

"You're very blunt."

They were interrupted a nurse walking by and deliberately pouring her drink into Cristina's lap, "_Whoopsie_."

"Are you kidding me?" Exclaimed Cristina, "I will kill you, you know that?"

"Bring it on!" Said the nurse,

"Oh, she, oh Bring it on! Okay Mama. Let's bring it on! Oh look at her spry! What you wanna cheer it out soccer mom?"

"Oh soccer mom!" They both started to yell at each other and Joe walked over to the, holding each of their shoulders just in case,

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Beat each other up and there's not gonna be anybody left to set your broken bones." They continued to yell, "Hey!"

Meredith walked to Cristina and took her arm and walked away, "We were just leaving."

"Yeah because I gotta go save lives!" Cristina snapped over her shoulder,

"Bye!" Said the nurse,

George pushed through the nurses, "Excuse me, they're my ride. Excuse me."

"Don't worry George." Addison said, "Stay, I'll drive you home." George nodded awkwardly, "Uhh, thanks, Doctor Montgomery."

"George we're roommates, outside the hospital you can call me Addison."

He nodded, "Addison, yeah. Ok." He gave an awkward smile and returned to the nurses.

Joe stepped back behind the bar, "What can I get ya?"

"Can I just have a coke? I need to stop drinking."

Joe nodded and got the drink, "Here you go."

Addison gave a short thank you smile and sipped her drink,

"Penny for your thoughts?" Asked Joe,

Addison looked up, "Oh. …It's nothing."

* * *

A few days had passed and Izzie woke early this morning. She got up, showered and dressed, then headed downstairs where she started to prepare her breakfast; coffee, toast, and a muffin.

Izzie took a deep mouthful of her coffee and made her way to the door to get the day's paper. Once back in the kitchen she sat down and started to read.

**_SEATTLE RAPIST CAUGHT AT LAST_**

_Many of us remember the serial rapes of six young women that occurred between early 1996 to late 1997. The Seattle Rapist, Frank Lennings (now 51) vanished off the radar after possible sketches reached the news nearly eight years ago, but has now turned himself in to Police. (Continues Pg 3)_

Izzie shrugged and found page three, the article took up the whole page.

_Lennings claims he never meant to hurt these six women (who ranged from 18 to 31) but he has seen the ill of his ways and he's ready to face the consequences. Police say that Lennings was shocked and horrified to find out one of he's six victims ended up pregnant._

Izzie winced and Addison walked into the kitchen, "Good Morning."

"Hey." Izzie glanced up and smiled at her. She turned back to the paper and saw six pictures; the victims.

She scanned over them but frowned at the third one. The women looked familiar. Under neath was a caption.

_Raped November 24__th__ 1996, Eighteen, Meredith Grey._

Izzie's eyes snapped to the picture and she saw, horrified, the photo was Meredith's 18th birthday. Izzie couldn't speak. She could only stare at the photo.

That was until another named jumped out at her.

_Raped November 10__th__ 1996, Twenty-Six, Addison Forbes Montgomery._

**____________**

**Grey's Anatomy  
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**

**Review!!! please :)  
**


	14. I Want You There

_Here's another chap for you. sorry for the small wait, but i re did this chapter. 2x16_

**Chapter 14 – I Want You There**

Izzie swallowed, "Uh… Doctor Montgomery-"

"Addison." Addie told her, "I'm only Doctor Montgomery when we're at the hospital."

"Right. Well, uh, Addison, you might want to look at this." Izzie held the paper up, showing Addison the front page.

Addie took it and read quickly, then flipped to page 3 and read on.

Izzie saw her eyes fill with tears, "Thanks… Izzie." She wavered, "Excuse me." And Addison left the room, dropping the paper on the floor and rushed up the stairs, Izzie heard the bathroom door lock.

Izzie quickly finished her breakfast then made her way to Meredith's room, the paper in her hand.

"Uh Mere? You awake?" She asked,

Meredith grunted, "What?"

"Well…" Izzie walked forward and handed Meredith the newspaper.

Meredith read it, and then threw it of the bed.

"Thanks." She muttered before lying back down and rolling over, away from Izzie.

"Mere?" Izzie asked hesitantly, "You have to get up soon. We uh… we have work."

Fifteen minutes later Meredith wasn't up and Addison hadn't left the bathroom. Izzie walked into George's room and immediately sneezed. She saw him on the floor and frowned,

"What are you doing on the floor? Get up. Meredith needs help."

Izzie left and George pulled himself up and walked to Meredith's room. Meredith was curled in bed, the newspaper Izzie had been reading before was still on the floor.

"I'm not going." Meredith said, her back facing Izzie and George so they wouldn't see the tears in her eyes,

"You have to go to work." said Izzie, "You're an intern. Saving lives is not optional."

"It is now. I'm staying home."

"You're supposed to be helping." Izzie hissed at George,

George went over and sat on Meredith's bed.

"Uh Mere?" He said, "Maybe, um there'll be a horrible accident nearby the hospital. Cut a bunch of people open. Sternotomies, Craniotomies. That'd be fun, right?"

"I don't care about surgeries!" Meredith exclaimed, and she grabbed a second pillow and placed it over her head.

When that didn't work Izzie checked on Addison who wasn't even speaking, and still locked in the bathroom. George called Cristina.

Cristina arrived holding another newspaper, shoved it at George and went into Meredith's room.

"You have a feeling?"

Izzie and George waited outside, George reading silently,

Meredith removed her pillow, "Yes."

"Ok, what kind of feeling?"

"Like I might die."

"Today? Tomorrow? In 50 years?" asked Cristina, "'Cause we're all gonna die eventually, but now we're late. Let's go!"

Addison left the bathroom and saw Izzie and George waiting dressed outside Mere's room.

"She won't get up." Izzie said,

Addison nodded and walked into the room and said five words.

"You're stronger then this Meredith."

Meredith sat up and looked at Addison, "We can get through this." She replied, finishing the phrase that kept them going nine years ago.

Meredith got up and walked out of the room followed by Addison and a stunned Cristina.

* * *

Later that day Meredith was with a patient, in surgery with Burke. Hannah, a paramedic, had her hand in their patient's chest, and she was the only thing stopping him from bleeding out.

"Okay everyone. I'm going to do a thoracotomy and Hannah here is going to pull her hand out. Dr. Grey is going to clamp the bleeder when we have more exposure." Burke explained, he turned to Hannah, "Ready?"

"More than ready."

"Scalpel." Burke held his hand out and a nurse passed him the scalpel, he held it over his patient, preparing to cut. "Ok, on the count of the 3. One… Two… Three." Burke was just about to press the scalpel against his patient's skin when Alex opened the OR door panting.

"Dr. Burke? I need to speak with you."

Burke looked up annoyed, "I am in surgery, Karev."

"You wanna talk to me sir." Alex insisted,

Burke looked at him for a moment before handing the scalpel back to the scrub nurse. He made his way over to Alex who was standing at the doorway. The entire OR team and Hannah watched.

"Karev, if you interrupt me in my OR it better be for a good damn reason." Burke warned, but Alex interrupted,

"Was it through and through?"

"What?"

"The wound on James Carlson. Was it through and through?"

"No, it was just an injury. No exit. Why?"

Alex sighed.

Meredith stood at the operating table staring at the two, they were muttering and Alex looked deadly serious.

Hannah made a comment about Alex but Meredith ignored it. Burke looked at his patient and continued to talk to Alex in quieter tones. Burke turned, but Alex didn't leave.

"Hannah."

"Yes, Dr. Burke?"

"What do you feel? Inside of Mr. Carlson. What is your hand touching?"

Hannah frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Is your hand touching anything hard?" Everyone looked one confused, "Like metal."

"Um, I don't know." She looked down at where here hand would be,

"Don't move your hand. Just tell me what you feel."

"Dr. Burke, what's going on?" Asked Meredith,

"Hannah?"

"Um, my finger tips are touching something...kinda hard." She nodded, "Yeah, yeah definitely."

"Oh my god." The anaesthesiologist said gravely,

"What?" Hannah panicked slightly, "What's wrong?"

"Hannah, I don't want you to move. Not your hand, not your body. Not an inch."

"Ok you should know you're starting to scare me."

"Don't be scared. Everything is going to be fine. Dr. Grey could you." Burke motioned her over,

Meredith walked over looking confused, Burke continued to face the patient and Hannah but he spoke to Meredith in a quiet and barely even voice,

"I want you to walk out of this room. Walk, do not run." He enforced, "Go and tell the charge nurse that we have a code black."

"I'm sorry, code black?" Meredith whispered very confused,

"Code black. Tell him that I am sure. And then tell him to call the bomb squad."

* * *

Dr. Bailey was going to be having her baby today and she sat with Addison on the small couch in her room. She had refused an epidural.

"Women all over the world do this at home." Bailey said, her voice slightly strained, "With nothing more than a pair of scissors and a bucket of hot water."

"Well women all over the world also die giving birth at home every single day." Said George who was standing in the door way. Addison and Bailey both gave him a look, "I did not just say that." George said,

"You're supposed to be making yourself useful and finding my husband."

What Bailey didn't know was her husband was in a car collision while he was rushing to the hospital. She also didn't know he was currently in surgery with Derek in the OR next to Burke's.

"What? I..." George said,

Addison interrupted, "He's ah, not here."

"Oh now he should be here by now!" Exclaimed Bailey,

"Ok we're going to go find him. Right, Dr. O'Malley?" Addison said looking pointedly at George,

"Right." He left just as Addison pager went off; she looked down at it and did a double take, making sure the words weren't her imagination.

**_CODE BLACK_**

"What?" Asked Bailey, noticing the look on Addison's face,

"Oh nothing. I'll ... I'll be right back."

* * *

Addie just found out how real this was. Code Black. No drill. The bomb squad had arrived.

Addison looked at Izzie, "Where's Meredith?"

"Uh, she was with Dr. Burke."

Addison's heart faulted.

* * *

Addison walked into Bailey's room trying with all her might not tho think about the bomb that could kill her girlfriend and ex-husband at any second. Bailey was standing next to the bed, passing another contraction,

"Trying to get gravity to do me a favour." Bailey told her as Addison checked a few things quickly, "I'm 9 centimetres dilated. I need that last centimetres."

"Good. That's ah …good." Addison told her still preoccupied. She avoided looking at Bailey. Addison knew her eyes were bloodshot and if she looked at Bailey knowing Tucker was in brain surgery next to a bomb… She didn't want to think about it.

There was a pause, Addison had her back to Miranda, her eyes were filling and she couldn't stop them.

_You're stronger then this Addison_. She told her self. _You can get through this_.

Addie wiped her eyes and sniffed trying to pull herself together.

"Dr. Montgomery?" asked Bailey, "Where, exactly, is my husband?" She asked slowly.

Addison turned, "He's with my husband." She walked forward and started to break the news,

* * *

Cristina and Meredith found Hannah shaking; the anaesthesiologist had left, leaving her with the ambu bag. Hannah was panicking and told them she was going to take her hand away now.

Cristina took over the ambu bag and Meredith was trying to calm Hannah down.

"Hey, somebody help! Help here!" Cristina yelled.

Burke and the leader of the Bomb Squad, Dylan, rushed in, "I think I'm going to take it out now." Hannah cried,

"Ok we're almost to the finish line." Mere said, "You can do this."

"No, no. No, I just want to take it out and be done with it."

"Hannah. It won't be much longer. Remember you're keeping him from bleeding out." Burke tried to soothe,

"No!" cried Hannah, "I am _22 years old!_ I should not even be in here! This is some kind of mistake!"

"She's panicking." Dylan said to Burke, "We need to clear the room."

"I'm not leaving." Meredith stated,

"Grey, let's move."

"I'm not leaving her." She said again,

"Get everyone out now Dr. Burke."

"She's my intern. I am responsible for her."

Meredith had her hand over Hannah's arm trying to keep it there. Hannah was crying and talking and Meredith was trying to sooth her Burke and Cristina talking over the top.

"No, it's gotta come out! It needs to come out!" Hannah cried,

"Yang, go with Dylan." Burke said,

"You go with Dylan." Cristina retorted,

"It's alright. Hannah, look at me." Meredith tried,

Hannah shook her head, crying harder, "NO! It's gotta come out. No, NO!"

"Hannah, look at me. You can do this."

"Hannah, you need to calm down." said Dylan, "You need to relax. Everything's gonna be fine."

"No!"

"Hannah. Hannah."

"Hannah. You can do this."

"No. It has to come out." Hannah continued to cry,

"No, you keep it there. Just a little while longer." Said Burke but Hannah yelled over him,

"I have to! I have to!"

She yanked her hand away and Cristina, Burke, and Dylan fell to the floor the ambu bag forgotten. Hannah ran to the door still crying and ran away.

Meredith was still standing, staring at Hannah then down at her hand, which was no longer visible, as it had replaced Hannah's in there patients chest.

Cristina looked up and saw, she stood and so did Burke and Dylan. They were all staring at Meredith.

"Meredith." Whispered Cristina,

"What did I do?" Murmured Meredith to herself, "Oh God."

"Just stay right where you are." Dylan whispered, "Nobody move. Stay exactly where you are."

Meredith took a long, slow breath.

"What did I do? What did I do? What did I do?" She said under her breath, over and over.

**suspence! not really... :P**

review!  



	15. I'm More Lonely Then Before

_Hey guys! Hope you all have a fantastic Christmas and Happy new year :):) Here is part 2 in the bomb installment. 2x17  
_

**Chapter 15 – I'm More Lonely Then Before**

Meredith felt tears swell in her eyes as Cristina left the room for safety. She turned to Dylan.

"So you have a plan, right?" She nodded to her self, sniffing slightly, "You have a way to get me out of this, right?"

Dylan looked at her and she understood.

* * *

"Calm down." Said Addison,

"Calm down?" Richard said, upset, "I have an evacuated O.R, a bomb in a body cavy, a missing paramedic, an intern with her hand on the explosive! Two world class surgeons in harm's way!"

"What?" Addie stopped him, "Missing paramedic?"

"Damn girl ran off."

"But-"

"An intern put her hand there instead. An _intern!_"

Addison starred at him, "Which intern?"

"What?"

"Which intern Richard?"

"Meredith Grey."

"Meredith…" Addison gaped,

"I can't worry about that, I have a man on a table who may bleed out at any moment unless we move the bomb from his chest! And my favourite resident in labour who you're now telling me refuses to push! Really! Calm down? You really want to say to me 'calm down'?"

* * *

In the OR Meredith watched as Dylan rubbed a hand over his face.

"I have to see the Chief of Surgery." He said, "When I come back we'll start."

"Wait."

He turned.

"Can you… could you get me my cell phone? I need… I have… I need to say…"

"We need to do this as quickly as possible." Dylan told her, "I'm sorry."

Meredith swallowed, "Can I have any phone?"

Dylan looked at her and pulled his own cell from his back pocket and passed it to her spare hand, and left.

Meredith looked down at it and dialled the first number.

Addison was sitting with her head in her hands. She wanted nothing more then to wake up and have this whole stupid day be a dream. To wake in Meredith's bed, wrapped in each other's arms. To kiss her girlfriend and get up early, so George and Izzie wouldn't suspect them.

Her cell rang, and Addie pulled it absently from her pocket. A number flashed on the screen. Nothing about it was familiar. And to be completely honest Addison couldn't face talking to anyone right now. She ignored the call.

Meredith sniffed as voice mail activated.

'_You've reached the cell phone of Doctor Addison Forbes Montgomery, please leave a message. In the case of an emergency; please page me.' _The pre recorded message of Addison's voice, calmed Meredith, even if it was only telling her additional contact information.

The phone beeped and Meredith spoke, her voice full of tears.

"Had to get voice mail didn't I." She gave an odd laugh, "I don't know what to say. I have everything sorted out. All my affairs. Except… Except for my mother." Meredith sniffed, "Oh God." She looked down at her hand, "I'm so sorry I did this, but… I'm to blame. Don't blame yourself. This isn't your fault… I… I love you. I'm in love with you." She sniffed again, "I guess this is my good bye then. Just, please, promise you won't forget me." She hung up and looked at Burke, who was giving her as much privacy as he could; his back was to her as he pumped the ambu bag slowly.

The next call was to her own home, so she expected the voice mail –or answering machine rather- this time.

"Iz, George. It's uh… It's me." She swallowed, "I'm sorry for this but… I'm sorry. Cristina, please don't blame yourself, or others. This was me and you know it. This was my incredibly stupid fault. Alex. Look I know we aren't close but listen, fight for the person you love. Ok? Fight for her. And Izzie… Let him." She sighed, "George… I'm sorry. About Doc and everything. You're like my brother and I love you. I love you all I guess." Her voice trailed off, "Look after Izzie will you George? This is going to break her." She took a breath, "Addison. My Addison… Why didn't you pick up? God… Take care of my Mindy. With Nate and Chris. And please Addie, tell Derek… Tell him I forgave him."

Meredith looked at Burke. And held the phone out.

"Tell Cristina something... and if we get through this… I swear I'll delete it straight away."

He nodded and took the phone. "Cristina." He sighed, "I can't be the other guy, I'm sorry. I love you."

He passed the phone back and Meredith hung up.

The next call hurt the most. "_Hello, Nate speaking_."

"Nate."

"_Meredith?_"

"I need to speak with Mindy." Meredith said, her voice wavering,

"_Are you ok?_"

"Please Nate, Mindy?"

"_Ok_." There was a pause before the familiar voice of her daughter answered, "_Mummy?_"

Meredith smiled through her tears and forced her voice to sound cheerful, "Hey sweetie."

"_Can I stop calling Aunty Addison, Aunty Addison?_" Asked Mindy excited,

"Not just yet baby; soon."

"_Ok._"

"Mindy I can't talk long, I'm at work." Meredith told her,

"_Oh._" Mindy sounded upset.

"I just wanted to tell you that you're daddies need to give you lots of cuddles from me, ok?"

"_Why can't you?_" Meredith felt that on some level Mindy knew there was something wrong.

"I might not be able too, sweetie, I have to work a lot now. I won't be able to see you." Dylan walked into the room and Meredith swallowed heavily, "Mindy, baby, I have to go now."

"_Ok Mummy._"

"By sweetie. Mummy loves you, ok?"

"_I love you Mummy._"

Meredith nodded; tears were spilling down her face. "Bye."

"_Bye Mummy. Mwa!_" She kissed,

"I love you. Remember that. Mummy loves you."

"_Ok Mummy._"

Mindy hung up the phone and Meredith closed it, looking defeated as she wiped her eyes.

Dylan beckoned Burke over and Meredith took over the ambu bag still crying slightly. The two men were standing in the doorway whispering and every now and then they would turn to look at her.

"Stop it." Meredith was surprised at how steady her voice was, "I'm not a patient."

"What?" Asked Dylan,

"The two of you are looking at me the way we look at patients." Meredith told them, "Like I'm going to freak out at any minute. I'm not freaking out. I just had to say goodbye to my daughter without her knowing. You'd be crying too, ok. I'm not freaking out, and I'm not gonna freak out, so whatever it is just tell me straight out."

Burke walked to her, "The main oxygen line runs directly under this room."

"Ok." Meredith said slowly, "Not ok. ... Well? I need one of you to tell me what this means exactly. Because I think I know what it means. But I tend to be glass half-empty right now so I won't trust what I think it means." She said to them, "Because what I think it means if the bomb were to explode over the oxygen line the whole hospital could blow up. ... And that's just crazy, right?"

* * *

Addison felt her phone vibrate and pulled it out. She had a new voicemail.

"Dr. Montgomery." George had found her where she sat in a corridor, "What are we gonna do? I mean about Dr. Bailey. Can, can we drug her?"

"Against her will?" Addie said in monotone,

"No. Well ... yes." Addison looked up at him. She didn't need this. "Can't we force her to push? If uh- Declare her temporarily insane?"

Addison let out an angry sigh, "You want me to declare Miranda Bailey. Miranda. Bailey. Incompetent?" She asked, "Do you think that will help? Do you think that will make her more inclined, more comfortable giving birth?"

"I don't know that's why-"

"Do you think I'm not doing everything I can to help her?" Addie asked, interrupting him, "I mean do you think I'm just out here because, I don't know feel a little lazy, just need a little me time?"

"I'm just asking." Defended George,

"_Stop asking!_" Yelled Addison, "Because no matter what you ask the answer is I don't know. I'm doing everything thing I can! _Everything_ I can! Miranda Bailey's husband is in mortal danger. _Actual_ mortal danger! And there's not a lot I can say to comfort her right now because there's not a lot that anybody can say to comfort me. _I'm doing my best_. Dr. Bailey is doing her best. And I need you to do your best! And I need it to better than standing here asking me the world's most stupidest question! _I don't know_ O'Malley!"

* * *

Burke had extended the wound and Meredith was supposed to be removing the explosive slowly and levelly. Except she wasn't.

"Grey. His pressure's dropping. …Grey."

"I can't! No. I can't. This is crazy." She turned to Burke, "Burke, you gonna go, you go. Both of you should go."

"Nobody's dying today, Grey."

"Meredith I want you to look at me. Look at me." Meredith turned and looked at Dylan, "I know this is bad. And I know that I'm this ass who's been yelling at you all day. So you pretend that I'm not. You pretend that I'm someone you like. Whatever you need. But you need to listen to me."

Meredith looked at him and wished; the scene changed. There was no bomb. No patient. Just her heart beat and her breathing. The room was bright and a tear fell down her face.

"I'm scared."

Addison looked over at her, "I know." She gave her a soft smile, "You can do this. It'll be over in a second. ... You can do this Meredith."

"Ok."

"Ok."

The reality flooded back, and Meredith started to remove the explosive. And slowly. Smoothly. She moved it forward and placed it in Dylan's hands.

"You did good." He whispered. And he started to walk slowly away, out of the OR. Meredith looked after him curiously. Then went out to see where he was going. Once she left the OR she felt everything shift. Her eyes shut tight and her breath caught. Her skin warmed and her whole body was thrown back, crashing to the floor. Windows were broken, walls were cracked and paper's fell to the ground gracefully burning away.

The bomb had gone off and Dylan was dead.

* * *

Meredith refused to go with Cristina; refused to let them do anything more then removed her scrub cap and gown.

Meanwhile Derek and Burke were standing with everyone else. Mrs Carlson had just left burke to go and thank Hannah for saving her husbands life.

Addison rushed forward, "Where is she?" She asked, "Burke, where is she?"

Just then the elevator opened, and Meredith, still covered in soot and blood walked out.

"Oh God." Addie whimpered and Meredith looked at her, and walked quickly forward and the two women embraced, tears falling down their faces.

Addison held Meredith to her, her face buried in the crook of Meredith's neck, ignoring the smell of blood. Meredith's eye's closed and she rested against Addie, who held her closer and kissed just above the neckline of Meredith's scrubs, her head still placed on Meredith's shoulder.

"I was so scared."

Meredith's lips found Addie's ear and she whispered two words that meant nothing compared to what she felt. "I'm sorry."

"Never leave me like that again." Addison begged quietly,

"I won't."

"Promise me."

"I promise." Meredith whispered back, she could feel eyes on her, people around them, watching. Izzie, Cristina and George. Alex, Derek and Burke. Richard and his wife.

She didn't open her eyes to look at them; instead she just squeezed her girlfriend gently and murmured so quietly Addison had to strain to hear her clearly.

"I love you."

Addison nodded into Meredith neck, "I love you too." She whimpered.

She straightened up, and wiped her eyes, then turned to Izzie and Cristina. The three of them took Meredith to the showers. They washed away the blood and cleaned her wounds. Izzie left to retrieve Meredith's clothes. Cristina pulled up her scrub top and Addison bent down, removing her shoes and pants so Meredith stood in only her bra and underwear. Izzie came back holding the clothes. The three made to leave, so Meredith could get changed, but Mere reached out and grabbed Addie's wrist holding her back.

When they were alone Meredith lent forward and kissed Addison softly and Addie let out a small moan.

Meredith dressed and Addison shut off the shower. But the two of them stayed in there alone for a moment holding each other once more, kissing gently.

* * *

They all went to Meredith's house. Cristina, Alex, Izzie and George. Mere and Addison walked up the stairs to Meredith's bedroom.

"I'm fine Addison." Meredith whispered to her, "Go down stairs."

Addie nodded reluctantly, knowing Mere needed to be by herself for the moment. She kissed her softly, and murmured her love then made her way down stairs, where the others sat in the living room, that morning's paper between them.

It felt so long ago she was worrying about that. That they had the nerve to do that. She was sure it was illegal, and she would be complaining, her parents would most likely sue, their way of showing support for her.

She walked out and closed the paper, the other's looked at her and she sighed,

"Say it."

"No we're sorry-" Izzie started,

"No. It's fine Izzie."

Alex cleared his throat, "A while ago we had this case." He let out a breathe, "Meredith had this case. She was freaked out. Because the girl… the girl was a rape victim and she..." He paused, "She had the same shoes."

Addison nodded, "She told me."

"I- I made fun of her." Alex said, "Because she had to carry- …I made fun of her."

"You didn't know."

"Was it her?" Cristina cut in, "The paper said one of the victims fell pregnant. Was it her?"

"Yes." Murmured Addison,

They were all silent until George stood to refill their drinks; he noticed the answering machine on the desk against the wall flashing.

"We have a message." He said softly, and he pressed play,

Meredith's teared voice filled the room. When the message finished they all sat stunned. Addison had tears in her eyes and she pulled out her cell phone pressing it to her ear as she listened to the voicemail from the call she'd ignored earlier.

She left the room as the tears poured down her face. She sat on the bottom of the stairs and sobbed softly.

"Addison?" She jumped and looked up. Derek was standing awkwardly outside the door. He let him self in and walked to her, "Addison are you alright?"

She shook her head, and wiped her tears, "She almost died today." She whimpered, Derek put his arm around her shoulders,

"But she didn't."

Addie nodded, sniffing slightly, "I'm in love with her Derek." She sat up and looked him in the eye, "I'm not saying this to hurt you. Because it's true, I'm in love with her. I always have been."

Derek nodded, "I could tell. When you were embracing I could tell."

Addison was looking down at her fingers, "She called me today. When she had her hand on the… she called me and I ignored it."

"She's alive Addison. She's alive and well and probably hurting incredibly. If you're anything to go by, one of her biggest secrets was shouted to the whole of Seattle, probably a greater part of America, and she saw a man blow up. Go to her."

Addison nodded and wiped her eyes, "You're in love with her." She told him softly,

Derek gave her a small smile, "Yeah… I'm in love with her."

"Do you want to…?" Addie indicated the stairs,

"No." He told her quietly, "She doesn't need to know I was here."

**TBC**

review! :) So like i said, Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays. Have a great time what ever you're doing.

(And there will be more of my original plot lines coming in soon, i swear)  



	16. You Might Be Perfect

_Hey everyone :) So here's a chapter full of McSteamy goodness. :P_ _oh and a warning, SOME ADULT CONTENT but its my first femslash smut so its not to bad. lol._

**Chapter 16 - You Might Be Perfect**

The newspaper that had released the article on the Seattle Rapist paid the price for their actions, literally. Each victim had been given a formal apology and a small settlement of money, which only brought more publicity and attention to the whole matter.

So of course the hospital wouldn't shut up about it. Nurses, patients, doctors and complete strangers would go up to Meredith and Addison and give sympathy, like someone had died. Except every time they would say, 'It must be so hard to have everyone know,' and quite frankly, Meredith was becoming pissed off.

Meredith was at a nurse's station, typing into a computer when she felt a presence over her shoulder. A familiar voice started to speak,

"Invasive non-cell. With a history of COPD. That guy's pretty much a goner, huh?"

Meredith turned, a grin pulling at her lips,

"Sensitive as always." She laughed at his surprised expression, "What? You didn't think I'd remember you? Why are you here anyway?"

She welcomed his hug and he picked her up into the air making Meredith let out an almost squeal of laughter,

"Visiting you. I'm confounded by the rain already."

"You get used to it." Smiled Meredith,

"Makes me want to stay in bed all day."

Meredith smirked, "Twenty seconds and you're already talking about bed. You haven't changed much over the last seven years."

"You have." He said, tapping his cheek

Meredith kissed his cheek, not noticing Addison stoped in the corridor; staring at them, "No more bed talk." smiled Meredith walking a few steps "It's not subtle."

"Subtle has never been my strong suit." There was a short pause, "So… Do you ever go out with friends?"

Meredith smiled, "I make it a rule not to go out with you."

"Then I am so glad you don't follow the rules."

"Are you hitting on me?" laughed Meredith, "In a hospital?"

"Would that be wrong?"

Meredith shook her head, trying not to laugh,

"It's good to-" Her sentence was cut off as the man in front of her fell to the floor, Derek having just punched him in the face,

"What the hell was that?!" Exclaimed Meredith,

"That was Mark." Derek told her, wincing at his sore hand,

Meredith bent down over Mark, "Are you ok?"

He raised a hand to his face, "I was planning on asking you that, actually."

Addison walked over, "Meredith please tell me you didn't call him."

"I didn't call him." Meredith said as Mark got up,

"She didn't call me." Mark said,

Addison didn't look at him, she rather pulled Meredith off to the side, "You will tell me everything he says. _Everything_ he says."

"Addison-"

"Right now I'm your boss, Grey." He voice lowered, "I can't be you girlfriend right now, I have an ex husband and an ex lover to keep from killing each other." Meredith nodded, and walked to Mark,

"Come on." She said, "Let me show you my great intern skills."

They made their way through the hospital to the trauma room; Meredith started to clean the cut on Marks face.

"You know it was stupid for you to come out here." She said,

"Well the way I see it, my two favourite girls need me."

Meredith smiled, "Thanks for the concern, but you should've called first."

"And have you shut me down?"

"Well then. You should have gone to my house, you know where I live." She paused, "But thinking about it, my housemate might have eaten you."

"Housemate, huh? She single?"

"Mark," warned Mere, "Don't."

He pouted, but then smirked, "So tell me; is she the blonde one or the Asian one?"

Meredith looked up to see Izzie and Cristina spying on them from the nurse's station. "The blonde one."

"Cute." Said Mark, "But-"

"Not your type." Meredith grinned, "You and Derek have the same taste in women."

"You and I have the same taste in women." Mark smirked, "Now if we could organise something a little more-"

Meredith laughed, "Not happening."

"I'm in love with her."

Mere softened, "I know."

"You are too." He murmured,

"I am."

"But you know it's funny," Mark told her, "Derek walks in on me naked with his wife, actually in the throes. And he just turns around and walks away. But he sees me so much as_ talking_ to you and I'm on the ground bleeding." He gave her a look, "Interesting, don't you think?" Meredith finished cleaning now and was about to start suturing his face, "What do you think you're doing?"

"You need stitches."

"I know." He smirked at her, holding out a mirror, "Hold the mirror."

* * *

Meredith was walking through a hallway, she was about to go into her patients room when she got a page. She smirked and walked off.

As soon as she walked into the on call room she had been paged to, she felt lips on hers. Meredith grinned and let her hands run through Addie's long hair. Addison's hands however, had other ideas. They pushed off Meredith's coat and pulled up her scrub top.

Meredith let out a heavy moan as Addison's mouth moved from hers along her jaw and down her neck. They moved to the bed and Addison continued to roam Mere's body.

"What's gotten into you?" Moaned Mere,

Addison had lost her shirt and was now straddling Meredith, pulling off her bra.

"It's been a long time Meredith, and I have a patient with spontaneous orgasms. I need sex. Now."

Meredith smirked, "I'm not complaining." She rolled them over and removed Addison's skirt then she started her slow torture. Addie whimpered and moaned and gasped, murmuring for God and telling Meredith how much she loved her.

Addison came with a throaty moan as she bit down on a pillow to muffle the sound. Meredith crawled over her girlfriend and kissed her softly; Addie rolled them over and smiled.

"I love you."

"Mmm." Meredith nodded, "I love you too."

"Your turn."

Meredith smirked, but as Addison's mouth found Mere's hard nipple and took it, lace bra and all, into her mouth, Meredith's pager went off. Meredith looked at it and groaned. She sat up slightly; Addison continued to kiss her, "Don't go." She murmured,

"I have to." Mere sighed, "I need to prep my patient for surgery." She kissed Addie softly, "I'll see you later." Then stood and started to redress.

Addison pouted, but pulled on her own clothes. As she pulled on her coat and brush her fingers through her hair she turned to Mere, "How do I look?"

Meredith smirked, "Edible." When Addison glared at her Meredith grinned, "I'd wait five minutes before leaving. You're… flushed."

Meredith gave Addie a quick peck, and left quickly.

* * *

Later that day Addison was walking along a hallway, as Derek and Mark rounding the corner ahead.

All three of them stoped, and Derek turned and walked back the way he came. Addison turned around too and started to walk away, Mark called after her, following closely.

"Oh come on, you're not even a little bit happy to see me?"

"Go home! Whatever it is you came here to do, just drop it and leave."

"Hey we all made mistakes Addison. All three of us." He said drowning her attempt to interrupt, "but somehow," THey had stoped now, Mark to close for Addie's liking, "somehow I lost my best friend and the woman I love."

"Please don't say that."

"Why?" asked Mark, "Because you lied to me? It's the truth Addison, you know it is."

"Why are you here?" Asked Addie forcefully,

"You and Meredith need me. And I need you. You're my family."

"Go home Mark." Addie said softly and she walked away.

* * *

That night Meredith found her self with Mark at Joes' Bar.

"How are you holding up?" Mark asked her softly,

Meredith looked down, "I'm trying to be strong." She said,

He put his arm around her and kissed the top of your head. "Let me take you home."

She nodded and they went out to his car. He drove her to her place and they parked in the drive way. She got out and he did to, he walked to her.

"Will you be ok?"

"I'm fine Mark." Meredith murmured, "I'm fine."

He reached out and lifted her chin up, "Really?"

"I'll be ok."

He looked at her, then bent down and his lips brushed hers.

"Mark." She whispered, "This isn't a good idea."

He kissed her deeper, his arms wrapping around her waist, her arms didn't moved from her sides and she didn't kiss back.

"Meredith." He whispered, and he started to kiss her neck,

"Mark stop." Meredith told him, "Mark stop it!"

Mark continued his actions. Meredith groaned and placed her hands on his shoulders then kneed him.

Mark winced and let go of her.

Meredith walked into her house and ran into Addison. She grabbed her hand and pulled her to her bedroom.

"Did you…?"

"I saw." Addie said, "I saw him kiss you and I saw you push him off."

Meredith nodded. Addison took her in her arms, "I love you." Meredith nodded and sat on the bed. Addison straddled her hips. "It's still your turn." She smirked.

Their lips met and Addison pushed Meredith back on to the bed.

**tbc...**

**review? pwetty-pwease. *pouts innocently***


	17. Take it in Your Stride

_happy 2010! lol Here's the next chap full of Poison Oak awkwardness_

**Chapter 17 - Take it in Your Stride**

Meredith lay in her bed staring at the ceiling. Her alarm started to buzz and she reached over, shutting it off.

In the attic above Addison sat at the top of the steps peeking down.

Meredith got up and went to her bedroom door, carefully listening against the wood for any sounds of movement. She heard none and walked out, tiptoeing. She heard a squeak and looked up and saw Addison trying to get down the attic steps noiselessly.

They stood and looked at each other awkwardly.

Izzie's door burst open and Alex fell out, pulling his jeans on and heading to the bathroom.

Addison walked past and down the stairs. Meredith and Izzie heard the front door open and close.

"Where's she going?"

* * *

Addison stepped out of her car. This land was nice. Beautiful. She could hear Doc whimpering and knew he probably wanted to go for a walk.

Addie made her way to the front door and was about to knock when she realised how stupid this was.

The door opened and Doc rushed out leaving Addison face to face with Derek.

"Addison?"

"Derek." Addie paused, "Do you mind if I walk Doc today? I need to… think."

Derek frowned, "Go ahead."

"Thanks."

Addison cursed herself. Stupid. It was so stupid for her to come here. To see him.

* * *

Meredith headed down stairs, almost running into George. Half an hour later Addison walked back into the house and started to get herself ready for the day. Meredith was in the kitchen making breakfast, Izzie, George, and Alex watching her suspiciously. Addie walked in and went to prepare her breakfast, saw Meredith and turned away.

"Fifty bucks says Montgomery caught her doing Mark Sloan." Alex whispered,

Izzie hit him but turned back to the two women, "There has to be something going on. I mean look at them."

"Alright she walked in on her doing McDreamy." He paused, "Did I just call that dude 'McDreamy'?"

"You know you did." Grinned George,

"Awesome." Alex turned to Izzie, "You are ruining my life."

Addison and Meredith sat at opposite ends of the table, not looking at each other.

"Guys. What's ah...what's a going on?" Izzie asked with a hopeful smile,

Meredith and Addie looked up from their food, "Nothing."

"You sure? Cause-" George was interrupted by Izzie,

"You tell us and maybe we can help."

"There's nothing to tell." Meredith said, giving a fake smile,

"Come on." Said George,

"There's nothing to tell." Addison said,

* * *

Addison was lying on an exam table, her legs in stirrups. She wasn't quite sure what was wrong but Dear God it was uncomfortable. Bailey was giving her a consult.

Miranda lifted the sheet covering Addison, "Oh no." She winced slightly,

"Please don't say that."

"Addison, I'm so, so, sorry. You have poison oak," Addison groaned, "where nobody wants to have poison oak."

Addison fell back on the exam table, "Oh god."

An hour later Miranda walked back into the exam room yet again, holding an icepack, she sat down, raised the sheet and placed the icepack on Addison. Addie hissed violently.

"Sorry, how's that?" asked Bailey, "Is that ice-pack helping?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. Eh!" Addie gasped,

"Mind if I ask how exactly this happened?"

"I slept with Mark!"

"Oh!" Exclaimed Miranda, "...And he had poison oak on his..."

"No! I slept with Mark a year ago and apparently this is what I get!"

"Yeah. But how did you..."

"I'm living with interns. In Meredith Grey's attic. I went to see Derek and it wasn't until I was there I realised how stupid that was. And I had to pee. So I squatted! Because I didn't want to wake my ex husband because the way he looks at me since that stupid paper, I just wanted a few minutes of peace." She started to cry, and pointed to her legs, "And this is what I get."

"No. No, no. Don't cry." Bailey pleaded,

"This is what I get!"

"Please don't cry! Please don't cry!" She stood, "Stop! You're gonna make me-" She removed her hands from her chest and sighed, "lactate."

"I'm sorry." Cried Addie,

* * *

Meredith was standing in the elevator. It stopped and Derek walked on, smiling slightly.

"Don't." She said,

"Don't?"

"Don't be nice to me." She paused, "...I did a horrible thing."

"We all do horrible things."

"No." Said Meredith, "I- I- I did a thing that I can't even believe I did and ... I was sad and uh. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna lose my closest friend."

"You won't lose me." Derek gave her a half smile,

"You're not my friend."

"Yes I am." She gave him a look, "Well then I could be. I'm a very good friend."

"No we can't be friends." Meredith said, "No."

"We could be friends. You'd be lucky to have me."

"How? How can we be friends?"

"We could ah ...hangout. Mmm hmm. I walk Doc every morning. Tiger Mountain Trail. We could meet. Have coffee. Watch Doc play and ...discuss the complex nature of our existence."

"Right."

"We could. Might be fun. I could be your friend Meredith."

Meredith gave him a look. "No. We can't."

* * *

Meredith walked towards the door of an exam room. Bailey had paged her here, something about Addison.

She raised her hand to knock, "I wouldn't do that if I were you."

Doctor Webber walked up behind her,

"Dr. Bailey said she…"

"If she wants some privacy then we will give her, her privacy, understood?" Interrupted Richard,

"I was paged."

"You were?"

"Yeah."

Bailey walked forward carrying her son, "She was and I'm still not here. I'm still on maternity leave and," She turned to the chief, "I still need some privacy Chief. Come here." Meredith walked into the room and Bailey shut the door in Richard's face.

"No moving, no peeking, no pulling the curtain. Just stand there. Let her talk to you, understand?" Bailey said,

Meredith looked round confused, "Uhh, yes Doctor Bailey."

"Good. Let her talk." Bailey gave a small smile and left,

"Addison, what's going on?"

"Stay where you are!" called Addison, "Promise!"

"I promise."

"I'm gonna show you something and when I do you do not get to laugh."

"Ok," Meredith said, "But what's wrong?"

"I have poison oak."

Meredith pulled back the curtain hiding Addie and looked at the glum woman, "Poison oak?"

Addison lifted up the sheet covering her slowly; Meredith frowned but bent down and looked.

"Oh." She winced, "Yes you do… Ow." Meredith bit her lip, trying not to laugh,

"So is this bad enough!?" She yelled, "I mean have I repaid my debt to society?"

Meredith couldn't help but laugh, she walked around to Addie's side.

"I dunno, I mean you did ruin Mark's life."

Addison hit her with a pillow, Meredith laughed more. She dropped the pillow and lent over Addison.

"I'm sorry." She whispered,

Addie knew what she meant and tensed slightly, "I know. But I'm still…"

Meredith nodded, and smiled, "Poison oak. My Addison went and got Poison oak."

Addie pouted and Meredith lent forward and kissed her deeply.

"I'm still not talking to you." Addie mumbled against Meredith's lips,

"I know." She pulled back, and moved to Bailey's seat, "Alright, let's take a look." Mere pulled up the sheet and pressed a kiss to Addie's knee.

"Get off!" laughed Addie, throwing the sheet back over herself, "Come here."

Meredith obeyed and Addison kissed her softly.

"If I forgive you will you-" Addison mumbled, but Mere spoke over her,

"I will make it up to you every day." They looked at each other and remembered last night.

_Meredith lay back on the bed moaning heavily, Addison working magic between her legs._

"_Uhh!" Meredith moaned, "Oh God."_

_Addison grinned and started work faster, wanting to her Meredith lose control._

"_Oh God, oh God, oh God! Oh! I love you!" Meredith came, "Oh God!! OH!! Oh __Derek__!!!"_

_Addison stopped moving._

"_What?"_

_Meredith lifted her head and looked down at Addison. She froze. "Oh God." She muttered, "Oh shit, Addie." But Addison was already up, "Addison!" Meredith called after her,_

"_Fuck." Meredith fell back to the bed, "Fuck."_

"I can't." whispered Addison, "I can't."

"Addie." moaned Mere, "Please."

Addison raised a hand and caressed Meredith's cheek, "You're not ready."

"I love you."

"I know. I'm sorry."

Meredith bit her lip, "Addie."

Addison placed a soft kiss to Meredith lips and Meredith whimpered slightly.

"I'm still your friend Meredith." Addison told her, "I'm just not your girlfriend."

**don't hate me *hides***

**  
oh, and review :)  
**


	18. Look Into My Eyes

_Hey here's__ the next chapter :) I hope you like it. :):):)_

**Chapter 18 - Look Into My Eyes**

Addison was helping her pregnant patient stand up, Mr Gibson, the woman's husband was helping too.

"I appreciate you taking over my wife's case, uh, uh Dr. Pollack says you're the best."

Addie smiled, "Oh it's my pleasure Mr. Gibson."

"He didn't mention that ah, wow, you bear a striking resemblance to a young Catherine Deneuve." Addison looked up at him, across the room Meredith stared up at him too, "Oh you've, you've never heard that before?"

"Uh, eh no." lied Addie, "Sorry I, I have to say it's a first."

"Oh, beautiful. Beautiful." said Mr. Gibson, "Well Miss Deneuve." Addie's pager went off and she checked it, "Of course you are too but by extension."

"Right, we'll be back um in later to check on your wife." Addie said awkwardly, stealing a glance at Meredith,

Meredith frowned after her.

_The year was over and at the end of the summer Meredith would be moving, taking her place in college._

_Addison and Mere were lying on the couch, Mere on Addie, kissing her softly._

_Addison grinned and pushed her back slightly, "I'm trying to watch." She indicated the TV._

_Meredith laughed, "You can't speak French."_

"_There are subtitles Mere." Addie turned towards the TV and Meredith took the opportunity to start kissing Addie's neck._

_Addie moaned and Meredith smirked into her skin._

"_What do you think of her?" Addie asked, pointing at an actress, "Do you think she's good?"_

_Meredith looked up, "I don't speak French either."_

_Addie laughed, "So?"_

"_Oh." Mere smiled and she looked at the screen, "She's hot."_

"_She is." Agreed Addie,_

"_Looks a bit like you."_

"_Oh?"_

"_Yea. Why who is she?"_

"_Catherine Deneuve."_

_Meredith continued to watch the screen and Addie pouted, "Weren't you busy?"_

"_I thought you wanted to watch." Meredith smiled innocently,_

_She lent forward and her lips brushed Addie's._

"_I prefer red heads." She smiled and continued to kiss her._

Addison came back with a jolt as she Bailey and the interns stopped, the chief talking to Miranda. She sent George and Cristina to the ER for a case.

* * *

At lunch Mere walked through the cafeteria holding Bailey's baby, she found Addie sitting at a table over from Izzie, Cristina and George.

She walked over and knelt down next to Addison.

"Addie you know how you love me?" She asked, Addison turned, "Could you please look after him for me? Bailey has a stupid emergency surgery and I'm hungry."

Addison smiled, shaking her head, "Ok." She accepted the small boy from Meredith's arms.

Mere grinned and placed the diaper bag on the spare chair.

"Thanks!" She kissed Addie's cheek and walked off to get her own lunch, Addie bit her lip, unsure if the kiss was friendly or a habit from dating.

* * *

Derek walked through the hospital, he found Meredith standing in an elevator alone.

"Hey." He smiled,

Meredith didn't look up.

"Ok." She said suddenly,

"What?"

"Ok."

Derek frowned slightly, "Ok what?"

"We can be friends."

"Oh," Derek smiled, "Good."

"Yea." Meredith paused, then reached out and stopped the elevator making Derek raise his eyes, "I'm going to tell you something."

"Ok."

"And there's this line between friends and not friends, so when I tell you this, you have to act like my friend. Not my not friend."

"I can do that."

"And you can't act smug."

"Ok." Derek looked at her curiously, "Is this the horrible thing?"

"Yes." Meredith sighed, "I'm only telling you because I need help, and I don't know who to talk to. I can't talk to my friends."

"Why not?"

"They don't know that…" She paused, "It's about Addison."

"You broke up?"

Meredith's eyes snapped to his, "You knew?"

"Well it's not that hard. I knew Addie used to have a girlfriend who she was really close to, used to look after her baby sometimes in her residency. I assume that's you."

"Yea."

"Oh and I saw you kissing after you gave me Doc. If I wasn't so jealous it would've been hot."

Meredith blushed,

"So what happened?"

Meredith sighed, "Ok, well." She paused, "We were in bed."

Derek nodded, a little uncomfortably, but he was insistent on being there for Meredith, being her friend, he could get through this.

"I called out the wrong name." Meredith said, "We were in bed, and it was perfect but I called out the wrong name."

"Oh."

"And she broke up with me. And I don't know what to do. She says we're still friends but when ever I'm around her I just… I'm in love with her."

"Tell her that."

"I have." Whispered Meredith, "She knows."

"Tell her again and again. Until she listens."

Meredith looked at him, her eyes betraying her vulnerability, "How?"

Derek smirked, "Do what I do. What you're doing now. Use the elevator."

Meredith nodded and started the elevator again, looking ahead in silence.

"Meredith?" Derek asked hesitantly, "Whose name did you call out?"

Meredith didn't speak, the doors opened to her floor and she sighed, she walked off, then turned, knowing they were alone, "Yours."

She walked away.

* * *

Meredith fell back on her bed with a huge grin on her face, panting slightly.

"Wow."

"You're better then before."

"Oh please, I lost my emotional virginity to you." Meredith told him,

Mark grinned and started to kiss Meredith neck causing her to moan his name deeply. "Weren't you gonna get back with Addie?" He asked,

"I was." Meredith told him, rolling them so she sat on his naked chest, "But I think she's probably right. It's too soon after Derek, and with everything that's been going on at work we never really got to address our relationship. So I'm going to do as she says."

Mark laughed, "I don't think this is what she had in mind."

Meredith smirked, "Shut up." She bent down and started to kiss him softly and slowly.

He grinned and kissed her back, things heated up from there and soon enough Meredith was panting again, meeting his thrusts.

* * *

Addison walked into the house, it was quiet; George and Izzie were drinking at Joe's. But she knew Meredith was home.

Toeing of her heals Addison walked up the steps, she left her bag and jacket at the foot of the attic stairs then walked to Meredith's room. The door was closed but she could hear movement in side, she knocked twice while opening the door.

"Meredith?" She asked, but froze.

Meredith was naked, she was having sex. But that was to be expected, Addie knew Mere would sleep with others until she felt ready for commitment. Addison had not been expecting her to sleep with Mark; the man who fell in love with her, his best friend's wife. The man whose life she ruined.

For some reason that made it worse. Made her angry. These two people were in love with her, so why were they sleeping with each other?

They hadn't noticed her yet. And as she stood frozen to the spot with anger she saw them both come and call out the same name.

"_Addison!_"

"Yes?" she found herself asking, "You called?"

**xD**

reviews accepted. *hint hint*


	19. Love Sacrifice

_Hey guys, sorry for the slow update but i got stuck with this chap and wrote the four chapters after it... i tend to do that sometimes._

This chapter is a little different from the others, the start and end are in first person (not Meredith) and the middle is flashbacks...._  
_

**Chapter 19 – Love Sacrifice**

I saw her sitting at the bar as soon as I walked in. My eyes scanned her form. Tight jeans, fitted long-sleave shirt, slightly messy. Dirty blonde in colour, and loose.

I walked forward and sat on the stool next to her, removing my jacket and placing it on the bar in front of me. I flashed the friendly looking bartender a smile and ordered a beer.

She glanced over at me with dusty blue eyes. I smiled slightly and she gave and awkward, mildly wincing smile back.

"Is this a good bar?" I asked her, "I haven't been here before."

She looked at me, "Have you just moved here?"

"Oh no, I've been in Seattle for a few years now," I clarified, "Just never here."

She nodded, "Well it's nice here I suppose, but almost everyone one works across the road at the hospital."

I smiled, "Do you?"

"Yea, I'm a surgical intern."

I nodded, "I'm a surgeon at Mercy West. Chief Resident."

A man walked over at her other side, placing his hand on her lower back, "No tequila?" he asked a smirk on his face,

"Not sleeping with you Mark," she smiled, "Not tonight."

He pouted at her and she slapped him lightly on the chest with the back of her hand.

"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be getting drunk with your friends complaining about Addie?"

"Leave Mark." He left and she turned to me, "Sorry about that."

"It's fine." I said, "Is that your boyfriend?"

She smiled and shook her head, "He's my friend." She said, "Sex friend."

The door behind us opened and we both turned our heads slightly at the ring of the bell. A tall woman walked in with a huge smile on her face that made her whole body glow. She was gorgeous, but as soon as she saw the woman next to me, her smile fell.

"She doesn't look happy to see you."

"That's Addison." She sighed, brushing her hair from her face, "She and I broke up, well. She broke up with me."

"I just had a break up too." I nodded understandingly,

"Sucks." She took a long drink from her beer,

"Yeah it does."

"Well, Addison's pissed off because she caught me with Sex-Friend, this is afterwards."

I nodded and sipped my own beer; I couldn't help but look this woman over again. She tilted her head and smiled as my eyes rose back to hers.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" she asked,

* * *

_It was nearing ten o'clock, Meredith and Mark lounged on the couch watching the end of a movie._

"_So I'm heading back to New York tomorrow." Mark said as it finished and the credits started to roll,_

_Meredith looked up, frowning, "What?"_

"_I'm an intern, I can't just up and leave; you know that."_

_She nodded, "Well what am I going to do about…" She paused, "I shouldn't want it, should I?"_

_Mark paused, "What, sex?"_

"_Yea." Meredith readjusted her position, "I mean I was raped. My one chance to loose my virginity was literally stolen, yet I'm crazy about sex."_

"_Well, in normal, well… I suppose the majority of rape victims…"_

"_Like Addie. She's sworn of sex, and men. You should've seen her the other day in the coffee shop, some guy hit on her. She almost started crying."_

"_Meredith all your hormones are… You're pregnant; it's natural for you to feel this."_

_Meredith sighed and ran a hand over her stomach._

"_My mother wants me to keep her." She said, "She wants me to move to Boston, she says she'll stop work. She wants to help me."_

"_Isn't that good?"_

_Meredith sighed, "I guess. But… I don't think she's doing it for the baby. Or me for that matter. I think she's doing it so she fells less guilty. You know, about always being at the hospital, and letting me live here by myself. She probably thinks if she does this then the rape gets cancelled away."_

"_She's your mother Meredith."_

_Mere nodded, but suddenly burst into tears._

"_I can't do it." She cried, "I can't be a mum, I'm only eighteen!"_

"_Hey." Mark took her in his arms and rubbed circles on her back, "It'll be okay."_

"_No it won't Mark! I'm too young, I'll turn out just like her, and my kid will hate me! And I won't even be able to look at her!" She was sobbing into his shoulder and Mark listened carefully, knowing Addison would need to know about this, "I can't bring his baby here; I can't raise a child Mark."_

"_There are options Meredith." He whispered,_

_Meredith looked up, "It's a bit late for that, Mark. And… I couldn't do it. I wanted to, I was going to, Addie had everything ready but I couldn't do it."_

_Mark realised his mistake and quickly cut over her, "No I mean adoption."_

"_Oh."_

"_You could put her up for adoption, I'm sure there's a couple out there that can't have the little girl they want so much."_

"_Mark?"_

"_Yea?"_

"_Could you stay here tonight? I don't want to be alone." Her voice was small and it broke Mark's heart._

_He hadn't known this girl for very long, having requested a temporary transfer to Mercy West's programme after expressing the special circumstances to his higher ups, but right now as he watched this broken pregnant girl whimper he couldn't imagine anyone wanting to hurt her in the way she had been._

_He kissed the top of her head, "I'll stay, and I'll call Addison, you too can have a talk or just I don't know, She can stay with you here, I don't think she likes being alone much either."_

"_I'm gonna miss you Mark."_

"_I know, I'll miss you too."_

* * *

_Meredith smiled softly. She could easily get used to this; waking in the mid morning next to Addison, wrapped in each others arms. Except she knew she wouldn't because she was in med school and Addie was in the middle of residency in Seattle._

_Addie woke then with a smile, she lent forward and brushed her lips over Meredith's._

"_Morning." Meredith smiled,_

"_Good morning." Addison kissed her again, "What are you doing today?"_

"_Nothing. I have no classes and no lectures."_

"_Excellent." Grinned Addie. They started to kiss again; Meredith rolled them over so she was on top of Addie._

"_Wait, stop." Addie said suddenly,_

"_What is it?"_

"_Nothing's wrong, there's just." Addie swallowed, "There's something I have to tell you, and I'm not sure how you will react."_

_Meredith frowned slightly, "Ok…"_

"_I'm going to tell you something and I really hope you don't freak our or reject it. Actually I was kinda hoping you would say something… similar to me."_

"_Ok. Go ahead." Meredith told her confused but interested,_

"_Meredith I think… I think that- no, I __know__ that… I'm falling in love with you." She smiled in relief having said it, "I'm falling in love with you."_

_There was a silence and Addison became worried. She gave a small squirm, Meredith still on top of her._

"_Mere? Are you going to say anything?" She asked hesitantly,_

_Meredith kissed her, and it was a kiss full of passion and emotion. When she pulled back they were both smiling and panting._

"_I'm falling in love with you too." Grinned Meredith, "I love you."_

_Addie's smile stretched wider and she kissed her softly and quickly,_

"_I love you Meredith Grey."_

"_I love you Addison Montgomery."_

* * *

_She wasn't quite sure when it had happened, or how exactly. But it had and she was pleased, happy. They had just been friends at first. Just two friends on a vacation. But along the way somewhere, they stopped sleeping through the men of Europe and starting sleeping with each other._

_Death and Die, the quirkiest couple to ever roam the Earth._

_That was until Amsterdam._

_Meredith had walked into their cheap motel room to find Sadie naked and in bed with some random guy who she doubted spoke English. That was the end of Death and Die, of the real Death and Die._

_Sadie had looked up and asked Meredith for privacy, but Meredith just stared._

"_You're sleeping with someone else?"_

_Sadie groaned and realised Meredith wasn't going to leave. Sadie got up and shrugged on a Tee, the guy went into the bathroom._

"_You didn't thin we were exclusive di you?" Scoffed Sadie,_

"_I've been."_

_At that Sadie laughed, "You?! Exclusive? Death you're a bigger whore then the prostitute on the next block."_

"_I may sleep around Sadie, but that doesn't mean I cheat on people!"_

"_Cheat? Death it's not like we're dating! We're just having some fun, experimenting. A nice little lesbian experience."_

_Meredith glared, "Just having fun?" she asked,_

"_Yea, I mean," Sadie looked at Mere, "We're twenty-five, and this is __Europe__."_

_Meredith swallowed, "I don't think we should continue this."_

"_This? Death there is no 'this' between us."_

"_Not any more there isn't." Meredith turned and left,_

"_Death!" Sadie called after her, "Where're you going? Death!"_

_Sadie jumped up and pulled on a pair of jeans then rushed out of the room, "Death wait."_

"_Why should I?!" exclaimed Meredith, "it's not like you have any common decency. I don't need or want to spend any more time then I have to with a bitch like you!"_

"_Death…"_

"_Don't__ call me that."_

"_Meredith," Sadie tried, Meredith stormed off, "Meredith listen-"_

"_No!__ Ok? Just do me a favour, __Die__, and go to hell!"_

"_Death I didn't mean to hurt you."_

"_Oh that makes me feel so much better, thanks Sadie."_

"_Meredith…"_

"_FUCK OFF SADIE!"_

_Sadie swallowed and nodded, "Ok, I'll just uh, I'll be here, if you need me."_

_Meredith didn't respond, she just walked away trying to stop the tears forming in her eyes._

* * *

I woke to the sound of my blaring alarm and repressed a groan. My eyes opened slowly and I smiled at the sight before me. My better half for the night was frowning at the alarm, her face screwed up cutely.

"Hey, sorry about the alarm, I have to get into work." I whispered, "You can go back to sleep if you want, I'll leave a towel out for you."

She rubbed her eyes, "What time is it?"

"Five am." I sat up in bed, the covers falling down my body revealing my naked chest.

"Ergh." She groaned and yawned, "I have to go to work to. I have pre-rounds."

"Well in that case you can have first shower. I'll make some coffee."

We both got up, I gave her a towel and led her through to my shower, then I dressed in boxers and a t-shirt. I moved to the kitchen and started to make my breakfast and coffee.

When she entered the room again, her hair dripping wet and dressed in the clothes from yesterday I had already finished.

"Do you want some coffee?" I offered,

She shook her head, "No, I'm uh- I'm just gonna go…" She looked at me awkwardly, "So uh, goodbye…"

I smirked. She didn't know my name, and I didn't know heres.

"Arizona." I introduced myself, holding out my hand, "Arizona Robbins."

She shook my hand briefly, "Meredith Grey."

She turned to leave and, with a smile, I called after her, "We should do this again some time."

I heard her stop in her tracks and I walked after her, "Casual sex I mean."

Meredith relaxed and turned to me, "I'm already doing that with someone."

"That guy from the bar?"

"Yeah."

"I don't mind. It's just sex." I grinned,

Meredith looked at me curiously in the eye, "Ok then," she bit her lip awkwardly, still looking at me, "Yeah."

We exchanged phone numbers and Meredith gave me that odd grin she'd given me last night.

"Bye."

"I'll see you later, Meredith Grey."

She smirked at me, "Yes you will."

**Please reveiw :):) i'll try update soon**


	20. I Have To Go Alone

_ok here's the next chap :) thanks for your reviews._

**Chapter 20 – I Have To Go Alone**

At first Meredith thought the day was having a great start. She woke in Arizona's bed once more and had delicious morning sex, then off to work for an early surgery with Addison.

The morning took a turn though. Four surgeries. Four deaths. And as Izzie had pointed out, there was a superstition that three more would come before midnight. Surgery deaths came in three's and seven's according to the morgue workers.

Bailey was leading all five of her interns to the ER, all of them needed to save a life. She was stoped by Addison, who smiled softly.

"Oh, Dr. Bailey," She handed Miranda a paper cup; "Here you go."

"What's this?"

"Hot cocoa; its a little ritual a friend of mine started when I was an intern, and I've kept it going. Four surgeries, four deaths, I figure we could all use a little good juju."

"And cocoa equals juju how?"

"_Hey, hey, hey._ Don't question the cocoa." She defended; she noticed George, Meredith and the other interns looking at her oddly, "Carry on."

The group started to move and Addie picked up another paper cup and stepped in front of Meredith, "Thank you for your help this morning." She said handed her the cup,

"Oh." Meredith said slightly awkwardly, "Thank you."

"This is professional juju." Addison clarified,

Meredith nodded, "So you're still-" Addison walked away, "…not talking to me."

Derek walked over to Addie, having witnessed her exchange with Meredith, "You could forgive her." He said,

Addison ignored him and handed him a cup, "Here you go."

"Juju."

"Yep."

"You juju-ed Meredith." He said, "You want to forgive her."

"I only juju-ed Meredith because she is the founder of my cocoa-juju."

"Hmm."

"What?"

"Nothing." Said Derek, sipping his hot cocoa, "You should forgive her."

"She crossed a line."

Derek smirked, "Maybe I'm just better then you."

Addie frowned, "What?" Derek smiled and Addison realised, "You think I'm pissed because she's still attracted to you?"

"Attracted is one way to put it." Derek teased,

"Derek that's not the problem, I'm still attracted to you." She paused when she noticed he looked smug, "Not as much as I am to her." She added, not because it was putting him in his place, it was just telling the truth.

"Wait, if this isn't about the break up then why aren't you talking to her?"

"Ask her yourself." Addison walked off, sipping from her own cup,

* * *

Meredith backed into an elevator with her patient next to Cristina who was also with a patient.

"I got hot chocolated." Meredith said, "She hot chocolated me. It's her juju."

"I don't like people who say juju." Cristina commented,

"I say juju." Meredith's patient, Nikki, cut in, but they ignored her,

Cristina's patient, who had OCD started to say 'juju' repeatedly in lots of three's.

"Juju, juju, juju."

"I didn't drink it." Meredith said, "I couldn't, I mean I was the one that invented hot chocolate as her juju. And she's not even talking to me."

"Juju, juju, juju."

"You're not obligated to honour someone else's juju." Nikki told her,

"Juju, juju, juju."

"Thought you were supposed to be the _bestest of friends_." Cristina mocked,

"Juju, juju, juju."

"I am. We are." Meredith said, "But she walked in on me having sex and moved out."

Cristina smirked, "Who were you doing?"

"Juju, juju, juju."

"It doesn't matter who, Addison's not talking to me. But she gave me juju." Mere paused, "_Professional_ juju. That's a weird thing, right?"

"Juju, juju, juju."

"Maybe." Shrugged Cristina, the elevator doors opened and Meredith and Nikki left.

* * *

Meredith was walking down a corridor, her head down.

"Hi."

She stopped and looked up to see Derek, "Hey."

He grinned, "Are you going to tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

He smirked, "Well, Addison tells me there is more to this… thing."

Meredith's smiled dropped, "She would be correct."

Derek nodded, "And…?"

"And what?"

"Are you going to tell me?"

Meredith let out a short laugh, "You don't want to know, trust me."

"I do want to know. We're friends, and technically friends tell each other their problems, and give each other the answer, then celebrate the moments of their lives…"

Meredith cut him off, "She walked in on me."

Derek paused and frowned, "Walked in on you?"

"Yes."

"You mean…" He bit his lip, unsure if he could say the sentence he was thinking, images of Meredith writhing in bed, her hand between her legs filled his mind, he hid a blush.

"With another guy, yes."

He snapped out of his fantasy, "Another guy?" His eyebrows raised,

"Not just a guy." Meredith said, "A guy that… Well I guy that's helped me out in that area before."

"So what, an ex boyfriend?"

Meredith winced, "Not exactly."

"Who?"

Meredith bit her lip, but decided to tell him. "Mark."

Derek's whole body stiffened. "Mark?" He practically hissed,

"Yeah," Mere crossed her arms and defended her actions, "I knew him long before I knew you Derek; you don't get to be pissed with me."

Derek swallowed his anger, "Ok."

"You're still my friend." Mere checked,

"Yes. Still friends."

Meredith nodded and they both walked away,

* * *

Meredith stood at a nurse's station finishing a chart before she went home. Nikki had died during surgery.

"Hey." Addison had walked over and she was holding to cups of cocoa

"Hey."

"I'm sorry to hear about your patient." She said, a soft smile on her lips,

"Thank you, Addison."

Addie handed Meredith one of the paper cups then turned and walked to Derek, handing him the second cup.

"Here you go."

"Thank you."

"Hmm." She sighed, "So did she tell you?"

Derek sipped the hot chocolate and handed it back to Addie, "Yeah. Here you go. Thank you."

"And?" Addie asked, she sipped the cocoa then gave it back to him,

"You've already forgiven her Addison." He said, "You're just to proud to realise it." He walked away and Meredith walked over to Addison.

"I'm sorry." She said, "About… well, about Mark." She paused, "And the Derek thing. I'm sorry."

"I know." Addie sighed, "I can't stay mad at you." She took Mere's hot chocolate and drank some making Mere laugh a little,

"Are you going to move back in?" Meredith asked, taking the juju back,

"I don't know." Addie said softly as they walked out of the hospital together, "Are you ready for us?"

Meredith didn't answer straight away, she took a long drink from the cup and sighed, "I really want to be."

"Well then, no." Addie told her, "I'm not going to move back in."

They now stood outside, near the car park, in silence, Meredith trying to catch Addie's eye.

"I love you Addie." Meredith whispered,

"I know Mere." sighed Addison, "I love you too."

"Move back in." Mere insisted, "We can stay innocent, I know we can. I don't like you living in a hotel."

Addison sighed and looked into Meredith eyes, "Ok."

Meredith grinned, and hugged Addie, "Thank you."

Addison hugged back for a moment then pulled away, "That's enough."

"Yeah."

Meredith's cell started to ring; she pulled it out of her pocket and answered,

"Yea?"

"_Hey, it's me_." Mark's voice filled her ear,

"Hey. You ok?"

"_Yea. I just landed in __New York__; I'm headed to my place now_."

"Good." smiled Meredith, "Thanks for calling." She paused, "And, uh, thanks for coming to check on me. And Addie too."

"_Is she still upset?_"

"A little, I think, but, you know, she's being the bigger person."

Mark smiled into the phone, "_Ok then, well, give her my love. I gotta go_."

"Ok, bye."

"_Bye Mere_."

"I'll call you some time ok?"

"_Ok, good_."

"Bye Mark." Meredith hung up,

"Mark? Meredith, you can't seriously continue to-"

"He just landed in New York Addison, he's gone home." Meredith told her,

Addie sighed, "Thank God."

"He wants me to give you his love."

Addie nodded lightly and they started to walk again,

Meredith couldn't stop the question from flowing off her tongue, "Addison why were you so angry when I slept with Mark?"

Addie looked up sharply, "Meredith…"

"No I'm serious Addie, you ended things, and I get it, I do, and I know you love me but, you were just angry."

Addison nodded, "Because he's Mark, Mere. He's a whore and he's just using you."

"I'm using him."

"He was my friend Meredith, a great, great friend and I used him and broke his life, and I just, I love him, he's my friend. But he's using you and I just… He's my friend and he's touching you and he shouldn't, he shouldn't be the one that gets to hold you and touch you and kiss you and I just- He's my friend, and it just feels like… Like you're me and I'm Derek."

Meredith nodded slowly, "So really, what you're saying is you need to find a slutty intern to sleep with."

Addison laughed, "Maybe I do."

"Well in that case I suggest Alex; he's slutty and relatively hot. He's like a Mark in the making."

Addie smiled, "Thanks Meredith."

Meredith smirked and finished her juju, "You're welcome, Addie."

**Review :)  
So i really love this chapter, i'm not quite sure why, i just adore it. lol.**


	21. How Much I Care

_Hey guys, here's an update for you, hope you all had a great Valentine's Day :)_

**Chapter 21 – How Much I Care**

Meredith was sitting in Joe's bar concentrating on the knitting needles in her hands. Arizona and herself had become friends, and Meredith had decided to go with out sex, Arizona wasn't so keen on this idea, and let Meredith know when evr they were together by outrageously flirting with her.

"Dude, is she knitting?" Joe asked Derek who was watching form the next table. Derek walked over and placed his drink on Mere's table.

"You know, as a friend, I got to tell you." Derek said, "You look a little weird."

"I am making a sweater." Meredith told them, not looking up,

"You're knitting. In a bar." Joe said, "You can't knit in a bar. You're scaring the customers."

"Come on, have a drink."

"I can't have a drink. I'm celibate." Mere said,

"You mean sober? She means sober." Joe clarified,

"No. Celibate." Meredith said, "I'm practicing celibacy, and drinking does not go well with celibacy, because it makes everything and everyone seem kind of porny." Derek raised his eyebrows but Mere didn't pause, "And then my head gets all cloudy and then the next thing you know, I'm naked. And my point is, I'm celibate, and knitting is good for surgical dexterity, so I'm making a sweater."

"You, celibate?" Derek said with a smirk, "I just don't buy it."

"No more men." Mere told him firmly,

Addison walked over with a grin, "No more men? Really? You?" She smirked,

Mere gave her a look then returned to her knitting, "Every guy I meet turns out to be married."

"Ooh. Ouch." Derek winced,

"Sorry." Mere said, "Or Mark."

"Ok, I'm gonna go over there now." Nodded Addie,

"Sorry." Addie walked away and Mere turned to Derek, "Or remember the horrible thing I did? Remember Addie?"

"You're making a sweater." Derek realised,

"I am making a sweater." Agreed Mere,

The door opened and Meredith glanced up at the ring of the bell. Arizona walked in with a smile.

"Hey!" she grinned more when she saw Mere,

"Arizona." Mere couldn't help a smile,

Arizona walked forward and hugged Mere, "How are you?"

Addison watched from the next table, "Well she's not breaking the rule." Derek said, "No more men."

Addie said nothing, just watched with a pang as this blonde woman flirted with Mere and how Mere smiled and flirted back.

* * *

The next morning Addison was walking through the hospital, passing Derek.

"Good morning." Derek said, walking with her as Addie put on her coat,

"Hey." greeted Addie, "You going into surgery or coming out?"

Derek didn't get a chance to answer because right then a figure ran to them yelling.

"Aunty Addison!"

Mindy jumped onto Addie who quickly wrapped her arms around the girl, grinning.

"Hey gorgeous." She kissed Mindy's cheek and balanced her on her hip,

Derek stopped and looked at the two.

"Hey there." He grinned, "Who's this?" He asked Addie,

"I'm Mindy." Grinned the girl,

"Meredith's daughter." Addie clarified,

Derek's eyes widened, "Oh!" He smiled, "Well it's very nice to meet you Mindy; I'm Derek."

"Oh thank God." Said a voice, Chris was running over, "Addie, could you take her? Nate's mum is in hospital we have to rush over but-"

"It's fine." Addison assured him, "I'll take her, and page Mere."

Chris sighed in relief, "Thanks Add." He kissed her cheek, "Ok Mindy, we'll call you when we get there baby. Be good for Mummy and Aunty Addison." Mindy nodded and Chris kissed her forehead, "I love you."

"Love you too." Grinned Mindy,

Chris nodded, "Ok, well I have to go. Bye Addison, see you soon Minds."

Addie grinned and looked at Mindy, "Come on then Miss Mindy. Let's find Mummy."

Mindy pouted, "Can I stay with you Aunty Addison?"

Addie chuckled and stepped onto an elevator with Derek, "Only for a little while."

* * *

Addison walked into her patient's room holding a chart and Mindy's hand.

"Molly Thompson. 22 years old, 32 weeks pregnant." George presented, "Transferred here from Mercy West when an ultrasound diagnosed the baby with congenital diaphragmatic hernia."

"Hello, Molly. I'm Dr. Addison Montgomery." Addie introduced herself, "I hope you don't mind but I've been put on baby sitting duty.

Mindy giggled, and gave a half wave, hiding behind Addie's legs.

"It's fine." Molly told her, "You're supposed to be the best."

"And not to put any pressure on you, or anything, but this is my baby carrying my grandchild so I really hope that you are." Molly's mother said, "The best, I mean."

"Mum, you're kind of threatening the doctor. Don't threaten the doctor. It doesn't help." Molly said quietly,

"Sorry. My husband tells me I have to try not to be such a mother lion because Molly's a grown woman and has her own life and everything, but... Roar."

Addison smiled and Mindy giggled again, "It's ok. I can take it. I am the best." Addie told them,

"You can fix this, though? Right?"

Addison walked closer to the bed, "We'll insert a scope into your uterus and then inflate a little balloon in the baby's airway, which should help stimulate the lungs to grow. It's not going to be easy on either of you. But I do have a strong record with this surgery."

Mindy came forward slightly shy,

"What's your name?" She asked,

"Molly. What's your name?"

"Mindy."

Addie ran her hand through Mindy's dirty blonde hair, "Mindy honey, we have to go now, say bye to Molly."

Mindy waved and skipped off with George, once they left the room Addie turned to George, "Make sure you get her to the MRI and get me the results as soon as you can."

"I will."

Addison smiled and took Mindy's hand, "Let's go find Mummy." Mindy nodded and they walked through the hospital,

George stood at a station writing in a chart, he noticed a man standing in the corridor, looking around.

"Sir? Can I help you find something?"

"Uh... is there a Dr. Meredith Grey working today?"

"Yes."

"She's here in the hospital, right now?" He asked,

"I can have someone page her for you if you want me to."

"No. No. Thanks." He went to leave,

"Wait!" George called, walking to him, "Excuse me, sir. Are you... What's your name?"

"Thatcher."

"You're..."

"Grey. Yeah."

"You're Meredith's father." George said, more of a statement then question,

"Yeah."

"Are you sure you don't want me to page her for you?" George asked, not quiet sure what to do,

"No. I'm sorry. It's complicated." Thatcher said,

Molly's mother popped her head out of the door leading to her room, "Thatcher, honey? We're right here."

"Oh. Oh. There you are, Susan."

"Did you tell him?" Susan asked George, "I roared a little. Couldn't help it."

"Oh. Oh, well, I knew you would."

Susan laughed,

"Uhh. I'm sorry, I'm Dr. O'Malley. I'm, uh..." He indicated the door to Molly's room,

"Uh, well, excuse us. Uh... check on our daughter." Thatcher walked into Molly's room with Susan, leaving George staring.

* * *

"Mummy, Mummy!" Mindy ran to her mother and hugged her, Izzie grinned,

Meredith bent down and hugged her, "Hey Mindy." She stood, "This is Izzie."

"Hi Izzie!" grinned Mindy, "Are you a doctor like my Mummies?"

Izzie didn't notice the slip but Addison and Meredith did, "Yes I am." smiled Izzie,

"When I grow up I wanna be a doctor." Mindy said proudly, "Or a teacher." She added as an after thought,

Izzie smiled, "Wow."

Meredith was paged, "Ortho?" She sighed, "I have to go Mindy. You can stay with Aunty Addie or Dr Izzie." She looked up, "You wouldn't mind?"

Izzie beamed, "I'd love to!"

"Thanks." Mere kissed Mindy's head, "Bye."

Addison kissed Mindy too, "You're going to be good for Izzie aren't you?" Mindy gave her an innocent smile

"Yes."

"Good. Bye Mindy."

"Bye Aunty Addison."

Izzie smiled and bent down to Mindy's height. "What do you want to do Mindy?"

"Uhh…" Mindy thought, "Can we play hide and seek?" Izzie looked at her innocent, begging eyes, "Please."

"Oh… Ok. But no going where you're not allowed." Izzie told her, "This floor only, and no patient's rooms."

Mindy nodded,

"Ok."

They stood there until Mindy giggled, "You have to count."

Izzie smiled and covered her eyes, "One. Two. Three."

Mindy ran off giggling.

Twenty minutes later Izzie was starting to freak out. She had looked everywhere. All the closets, on call rooms and nurses stations. Under gurneys and behind chairs in stair welds. She couldn't find Mindy anywhere.

"Damn it." She exclaimed and she took off,

She passed George on that stairs, "George!" she grinned, "Thank God. Have you seen a little girl, eight. Her name's Mindy, she's Mere's daughter. They look exactly alike."

George frowned, "Yea she was with Addison this morning."

Izzie cursed, "I was supposed to look after her but she ran off. Well we're playing hide and seek."

"You lost Meredith's daughter?" Whispered George, "Do you know what could happen?"

"I know, Mere will kill me."

"No." said George, "She could run into my patient, who just so happens to be Meredith's sister."

Another ten minutes later Addison was walking along the cat walk she passed George and paused, "Do you have Molly's MRI results?"

"No, I haven't. Not yet."

"What the hell have you been doing then?" Asked Addie,

"I was just going-" George was cut off,

"When I assign you to a case of mine I expect you to give it your full and undivided attention. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't take you off this case."

"Molly Thompson's maiden name is Grey." George told her, "Her father is Thatcher Grey. Thatcher Grey is also Meredith's father; which means that Molly and Meredith are sisters, but I don't think Meredith even knows Molly exists. And apparently God hates me because Izzie lost Mindy."

"Stevens lost my- Stevens lost Mindy?"

George nodded, "Playing hide and seek."

"Ok." Addison sighed,

"Ok, thanks." He walked off,

* * *

Meredith walked through the cafeteria carrying a tray; she sat at the table where Cristina was.

"Have you seen Mindy?" She asked,

"Mindy?"

"My daughter."

Cristina raised her eyebrows, "She's here? The Mini-Mere?"

"Yea, she's here." Meredith said, "She was with Izzie."

"Can't help ya."

Meredith nodded and sighed, "I'll page her later."

"You do that."

"You know what's weird." Meredith said after a small silence, "I thought I just saw my father."

"Daughter, father, why don't we have a family reunion?" Cristina said sarcastically, taking a bite of her food.

Izzie and George walked from opposite ends of the cafeteria, "Did you find her?" Asked George,

"Find who?" Mere said,

Izzie swallowed and walked forward,

"Where's Mindy?"

"Ahh, Mere…" Izzie said hesitantly,

"Izzie."

"So Mindy and I were playing hide and seek…"

"…Yes." Meredith said suspiciously,

"And… She's a really good hider, Mere."

"You lost my daughter!" Exclaimed Meredith,

"No! Not lost just… I can't find her."

"Izzie I will kill you." Meredith took off leaving Izzie and George looking after her,

Cristina smirked, "Barbie's playing with the kid. Nice."

Izzie took off, George followed.

* * *

Mindy was crying.

She had broken Izzie's rules and moved to a different floor but now she didn't know where she was.

She looked around the hallway and tried to focus through her blurred vision, sniffing.

"Mindy?" She heard a distant voice,

She looked up and wiped her eyes, seeing the women she met earlier looking at her from the bed.

Mindy ran forward into Molly's room.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm lost." Whimpered Mindy,

"Where's Dr- Where's Addison?"

"I don't know." Mindy cried, "I was with Izzie and we were playing, and then I went in the elevator but when I tried to go back I didn't know what way. And I can't find my Mummy. And my Daddies are with Grandma. And-" Her voice broke off as she sobbed,

Molly felt for the little girl and forced her self to move over on the bed, not easy for a 32 week pregnant woman. She patted the space next to her and Mindy climbed up, Molly hugged her.

"It's ok, you stay here and Aunty Addison will find you. It'll be ok."

Thatcher walked into the room holding two paper cups of coffee, "Your mother's just gone to the bathroom." he said, then frowned, "Who's this?"

Molly looked at him, "This is Doctor Montgomery's niece. She's lost."

"Oh dear." Thatcher put the coffee down on the wheelie table, "Should I have her paged?"

"Yea." Molly looked at Mindy, "Mindy? This is my Daddy, Thatch." She said, Mindy looked up and wiped her eyes, "He's gonna help you find Aunty Addison."

Mindy nodded and jumped down, she walked around to Thatcher and took his hand,

"It's ok Mindy." He said gently, "We'll find your Aunty."

He led her to a nurse's station, "Excuse me, could you please page Doctor Montgomery?" A nurse smiled and nodded politely,

* * *

Addison walked into Molly's room.

"Dr Montgomery!" said Molly, "Mindy was just in here. She's lost."

Addison put the chart she was holding down, "Where'd she go?"

"My dad took her to a nurse to page you." Just as she said it Addison heard her pager go off.

"Your father?" Addison said suddenly,

"Yes."

"I'll be right back." Addison left and hurried through the hallway, she saw the back of Mindy's head, and she was holding a man's hand. Addie cursed.

On the other side of Mindy, Meredith came around the corner; her eyes immediately saw Mindy and nothing else.

"Mindy!"

"Mummy!" Mindy let go of Thatcher and ran to her mother, Meredith picked her up and held her, walking over to the man, "Thank you so-"

She broke off,

"Meredith." Addison rushed forward,

Thatcher looked at her, then at the girl in her arms.

"Meredith?"

"Thatcher."

Addie placed her hand on Meredith's back, "Meredith."

Thatcher looked at Mindy, "She's…"

"Yes."

Thatcher swallowed, he'd so hoped that it wasn't her, the one that… "The paper…"

"Yes." Meredith said again,

"Mere there's something you need to know." Addison told her quietly, "I want you to hear it from me."

She led Meredith to Molly's room, Thatcher followed.

They stood a little away from the door; far enough that Molly didn't notice, but close enough that they could see her. Addie got Mere to put Mindy down, then hand still on her back she spoke.

"Mere, that's your sister."

Meredith swallowed and turned to Thatcher, he nodded.

"Molly." He said.

Meredith swallowed again, picked up her daughter and walked away.

She passed a blonde woman who stopped at looked after Meredith, "I saw a picture once from a long time ago, you look just like her." Meredith turned; Mindy wasn't paying any attention to anything, her arms wrapped tight around Meredith's neck, her face buried in her shoulder.

"Your mother. You look a lot like my girls. Especially Molly."

Meredith nodded awkwardly and shifted Mindy's weight.

"She knows about you. Or she knows that her father was married before and had another daughter. Has another daughter."

"No, had is right."

"Your father thinks about you. He thinks about you a lot. He just...Your mother...Your mother...She broke him."

"Excuse me. I..."

"Mummy?" Mindy whispered, "I need the toilet."

"Okay sweetie." Meredith looked at Susan, "I have to go."

Susan nodded.

While Meredith was gone Thatcher spoke to Addison quietly.

"You work closely with her?" He asked,

"Sometimes… She's my closest friend. We've been through a lot."

"And Mindy?"

Addison paused but decided he had a small right, "She's amazing. Meredith put her up for open adoption. A gay couple. They're great fathers to her, and Meredith sees her as much as she can. I do too."

Thatcher nodded. "How old is she?"

"Mindy's eight." She said, "I've known Meredith since she first got pregnant."

"I don't know what to say to her. She looks so much...so much like her mother. Ellis was cold. I mean, I was a coward. I was...I...I left. But her mother would never let me know her and... Now I don't know how to know her."

Addison smiled, "Ellis always loved me. I don't know why. But she came through. Those months she supported Mere and her choices. Held her hand in the delivery room. I was there, I actually delivered her." Addie smiled softy, "It's why I chose this specialty."

Thatcher nodded and Susan walked over, "Thatch?"

"Meredith will come back." Addison smiled, "She will. For Mindy's sake."

Addison walked into Molly's room with Thatcher and Susan; she gave a smile and started to go over the surgery.

"So I'm gonna do the surgery with a small scope. It will be minimally invasive. And then you should be able to do the rest of your recovery from home."

"Thank you. Yeah, Ok."

There was a small knock and they all looked up to see Meredith, Mindy beside her.

She walked over to the bed and Molly smiled, "Are you on my case too?"

Meredith shook her head, "No I- No." she paused and looked at Addie who gave a small encouraging smile. "No, I'm Dr. Grey. I'm Doctor Meredith Grey, and this is my daughter, Mindy."

"Grey?" Asked Molly, "As in…?" She looked at her father, who nodded, small tears in his eyes,

"Yea." Meredith said and Addison smiled.

Addison, Thatch and Susan left the room and Addie turned to Thatcher.

"She won't forgive you." She told him, "She won't. But if you give her time, and don't push, she'll accept Molly, and the baby. And she'll become family."

He nodded, "Thank you."

Addison smiled and walked away. Susan took Thatcher's hand.

"Mindy sweetie," Mere said in Molly's room, "This is your Aunty Molly, my sister."

Molly smiled, "We kinda met this morning when she was with Dr. Montgomery."

"Oh."

"Yeah, she came in here just before."

"I was lost." Mindy told her quietly,

"That explains why she was with Tha- Dad." Meredith forced herself to say, "Why she was with Dad."

"Yea."

"Aunty Molly?"

"Yes Mindy?"

"Are you having a baby?"

Molly smiled, "Yea I am."

* * *

Molly was in surgery and Meredith sat in the gallery, Mindy asleep in her lap. Meredith looked up from her knitting to see Derek standing in the corner.

"Hey."

"Hey, still knitting?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm getting so good at it." Meredith told him sarcastically,

"Hmm. I did a craniotomy on a kid today while he was awake."

"I met a sister I never knew I had." Meredith said, "And I saw my father which was, uh... I don't know what it was."

"Hmm. You ok?"

"I have my Mindy. And my knitting." She smiled,

Derek walked over and sat next to her, "She looks a lot like you." He said, "Very cute."

Meredith laughed, "Are you calling me cute?"

"Yea."

Meredith stopped her knitting and lent on his shoulder, "You're a good friend Derek."

* * *

Addison had finished surgery, she was about to go to the vets, Doc was sick and she wanted to see him. She needed to get Mere off her mind.

She sat in the waiting room and spoke to the receptionist, "I don't actually need to see the vet. I really just wanted to sit with Doc. I just want to spend some time with my dog."

The woman smiled kindly as an attractive man walked in and over to Addie, "Hi. I'm Finn Dandridge. I'm Doc's vet. And you are Dr. Montgomery, or Dr. Grey. One of Doc's other owners."

"Dr. Montgomery- Addison."

"We finally meet." Finn smiled, "Hello."

**Hehe, Finn is totally my fav reoccuring charrie. except Nurse Tyler :P**


	22. Put Your Arms Around Me

_OMG i finished typing this story today, (25chaps in total) and to celebrate i decided to update!_

**Chapter 22 - Put Your Arms Around Me**

Meredith lay in a hotel room bed completely satisfied and breathing deeply.

"That was…" She sighed, "…Thanks."

Mark grinned, "Again?" he smirked,

Meredith laughed, "Yes please." She rolled and moved so she was on top of him, they started to kiss and his hands trailed over her body. Her cell phone started to ring.

She pulled back and grabbed the phone, answering it, "Hello? Hey." She looked down at Mark, "It's about Doc, my dog." She went back to the phone, "Yeah. No, I'm here. Sure-" Mark took the phone away from her, "No, come on." She said to Mark trying to get the phone back,

"Dr. Vet or whatever. Meredith's going to have to call you back after we finish having our hot sex." He hung up,

Meredith hit him, "That wasn't the vet!"

Meanwhile at the veterinary clinic, Addison stood holding her cell. She hung up. Mark was back in town, and apparently back to sleeping with her girlfri- her _ex_ girlfriend.

"Everything ok?" asked Finn, as he walked in with Doc,

"Yeah. Everything's great." Addie bent down, "Hey, Doc. You look better."

"It may just be a virus. But I'd like to wait until we get the blood tests and the x-ray results back before I say anything for sure." Finn told her,

"So he can go home today? Because I called Derek and he says he can pick him up, and Meredith knows about everything too."

"He can go home."

Addison grinned, "You hear that, Doc? You can go home."

"So you and Derek, uh..." Said Finn trying to be conversational, "You're together?"

"Uh..." Addison faulted, "Uh, Derek and I are… just friends. Well we are now. We uh… well, we were married but that didn't work out and we're divorced now, but we're still friends. And I guess- yeah… We were married but now we're not. We're divorced. And friends."

"So you're single?"

Addison nodded, "Yes. I'm single."

"I ask because I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me."

"Out with you?"

"On a date. Tonight." Finn smiled,

"A date." Nodded Addison, "Tonight."

"And you're repeating everything I say so that you can buy yourself some time and figure out how, a way to let me down easy. It's ok. I get it."

"No! No. I... I... um... you know, you're very...it's just that... Yes. Yes ok, a date tonight." She smiled and sighed, "I'd like that."

"Good."

"Yea."

"I'll call you then."

Addison smiled, "Yea."

* * *

Addison walked to a nurses' station where Meredith and Cristina were talking.

"Meredith." She said, "I need to talk to you."

"Uhh." Meredith mumbled, "Can we, uh, can we talk later, Addie? I just, I uh, I have to go meet Bailey, I'm with her and..."

Addison sighed, "Go. But we will talk."

Meredith fled, and Addison looked at Cristina.

"I need an intern, you free?"

"I'm with Burke." Cristina left; Addie groaned and saw Alex,

"Ah, Karev, come on, you're with me."

* * *

Meredith ran and just made it into a lift; Addison was the only other person there. "Hey." Said Meredith,

"Well, hey." Addison smiled, "Meredith, I'm going to tell you something ok, and just so you know, after this morning you have no say in the matter ok?"

Meredith frowned, "Uh… ok."

"I'm going to date Finn." Addison told her,

"Finn? The vet?"

"Yes." nodded Addie, "He asked me out, and yes, I'm going to date Finn."

"Ok."

"Good."

"Yea… Good."

There was a short pause.

"So Mark's back in town. Celibacy didn't last long. "

Meredith nodded, "He's uh; he's planning on moving here."

"What?" Addison's eyes snapped to Meredith's face,

"Moving to Seattle. He gave up his practice."

"Oh God." Sighed Addison, Meredith laughed and nodded,

"So… how's your day been?"

Addie shook her head slightly, "Good."

"Good." Meredith sighed, "So, you're dating the vet."

"I'm dating the vet."

They both laughed and the elevator stopped.

"Bye Addie."

"Bye Mere."

* * *

Addison sat in an on call room alone. She had her cell to her ear.

"Finn hi." She said as he answered,

"I didn't call." He said, "I was going to but-"

"No, I just, I won't be able to make anything tonight." She sighed, "…I'm being sued."

"What for?"

Addie sighed, "It doesn't matter. I just, I can't make anything tonight."

"No it's ok. I can't either, it seems. I have this… errand."

"Errand?"

"Yea." He chuckled, "One the horses here is about give birth."

"You're birthing a horse?"

"Yea."

"Wow." Addie smiled, "Maybe I can make it."

"You want to birth a horse?"

"Yeah. I can leave right now."

"Ok."

"Ok." They both hung up and Addie left the hospital with a grin on her face.

At the vet, after birthing a horse Finn stood with Addison who was mourning the death of her shoes.

"Is it coming off?" He asked,

"No." sighed Addie,

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It was an amazing date."

"Technically it wasn't the date." Finn grinned, "It was the errand. Now... we could go up to my place. I could cook for you."

"Go up to your place?" Asked Addie with raised eyebrows,

"Well, do you want to come up to my place?"

Addison smiled, "Yea… Ok."

"Good." smiled Finn, "Because, here's the deal. You can come up to my place, take off all your clothes, shower off the goo, borrow one of my shirts, and I'll cook you dinner. I think you ought to accept that deal, because, you know. It involves you naked in my apartment. But, you know...that's just me."

Addison grinned and nodded, "You should know I'm not going to have sex with you."

Finn nodded, "Ok, well… I will respect that. But I can't promise I won't try kissing you."

"You can't?"

"No I can't." Finn moved close to her and she smiled, looking into his eyes,

"Well in that case…" Addie's voice trailed off lightly and her lips brushed Finn's. He held her gently, and kissed softly, not going too far. Addie pulled back, "I'm going to take that shower now." She said, "I'm still covered in…" He chuckled and nodded.

* * *

Meredith parked behind Derek, she got out of her car and he did too. They were at his trailer; Meredith really wanted to see Doc.

They walked to the trailer and found Doc, he was lying on the ground listless and by the looks of things he hadn't eaten.

"Damn it." said Derek, "He's sick again."

Meredith walked over, "Do you want me to take him to the vet?"

Derek groaned, "Yea. I'll call ahead. You go."

"Ok."

Meredith bent down and managed to pick Doc up and though he was heavy she got him into her car and she left.

When she arrived at the vet, Finn was waiting for her. She walked in with Doc in her arms, "He's been lifeless and hasn't eaten all day." She told him as Finn took Doc from her arms,

"Oh no. Let's have a look."

Addison walked down the stairs with wet hair, dressed in one of Finn's shirts, her long legs shown off.

"Hey." She said walking down,

"Hey." Meredith nodded,

"Is he sick again?" Asked Addie,

"Yeah."

* * *

George walked into the kitchen at Meredith's house; Izzie was eating cookies in her pyjamas.

"George! Hey."

"Hey." Smiled George, "Oh, this is uh... this is my girlfriend. Callie." He introduced as a tall woman with dark curly hair walked in behind him,

"Oh, hi." Smiled Izzie, "I'm-"

"Izzie Stevens, Hey." Smiled Callie,

"So we spent the night at Callie's last night," George told her, "so we figured we'd just spend the night here."

"Oh, ok." Said Izzie nodding, she looked away, towards the tray of cookies. She held them out, "Help yourself."

* * *

Meredith knocked on the familiar door to Arizona's apartment. It opened and she was greeted by the familiar blonde woman.

"Zona?" she asked,

"Yes?"

"You're not seeing anyone are you?" Meredith walked in and sat on Arizona's couch,

"No…"

Meredith nodded, "Good."

"Good?"

Meredith nodded, "I was thinking we could start… dating."

Arizona sat down, "Dating?"

"Yeah." Smiled Meredith, "I mean, I like you. You're really funny and nice and everything and I'll get it if you say no, I mean I'm boring and dark and twisty and messed up and only an intern and always busy and-"

"Meredith." Arizona cut it, "I'd love to date you."

Meredith sighed in relief and smiled, "Good."

Zona laughed, "Come here."

Meredith moved and Arizona kissed her deeply.

**Review pweaty pwease! I'll try to update by the end of the weekend :):)**


	23. Hold Me Tight

_There is indeed a sequel for those of you who are worried. I just need to finalise a few things, like the title for example.. lol_

**Chapter 23 - Hold Me Tight**

"What?!" Exclaimed Meredith,

Arizona grinned, "I wanted to surprise you."

Meredith stopped eating her breakfast –Dating Arizona definitely had its perks, one of which being a cooked breakfast each morning.

"You got a job at Seattle Grace?"

"Yes." grinned Arizona, "As an attending!"

Meredith's frown turned to a smile, "That's great!" She told her, "Congratulations." Meredith walked to Zona and kissed her, "When do you start?"

"Today."

Meredith's eyebrows rose, "Wow, ok, you really did want it to be a surprise."

Arizona giggled, "Sorry."

Meredith shrugged, "I will live." She went back to her breakfast and continued eating.

"I'm your boss now." Smirked Arizona and she kissed Mere's neck

"Yes you are."

"Should be fun."

Meredith sighed, "For you maybe." Arizona giggled and started to eat her own breakfast, "Do you want a ride to the hospital?" Asked Mere,

"That'd be great." Grinned Zona, "Do your friends know about me?"

Meredith swallowed, "Uh… They know I'm seeing someone, but they don't know who."

She nodded, "Do they know you're bisexual?"

"I don't think so." Meredith sighed, "I'm not hiding it or anything, but it hasn't come up before." She noticed the nervous look on Zona's face and chuckled, "They'll find out today."

Arizona smiled and nodded, the two continued to eat breakfast.

* * *

In another part of Seattle Addison sat in Finn's kitchen, on a bench watching him cook.

"You don't have to cook." Addie said, "I could cook."

"No one asked you to cook."

Addie jumped of the bench, "I don't expect you to cook for me."

Finn laughed, "Here, drink this." He poured her some coffee and she sat at the table in the middle of the kitchen,

Addie nodded and drank.

* * *

That morning Meredith walked into the hospital her hand held in Arizona's. They were chatting about nothing in particular and having a good time, Zona was smiling and Meredith was laughing.

"Do you have to see the chief?" asked Mere,

"I do actually," smiled Arizona, "Lead the way?"

Meredith nodded and they headed to the chief's office, "I have some time, so I'll wait for you." Smiled Mere,

Arizona nodded and walked into the office, five minutes later she walked out with a huge grin on her face, the chief behind her, smiling.

"I'll see you around Dr. Robbins." He told her,

"Bye, Dr. Webber."

The door closed and the chief stayed in his office, Zona moved to Mere and they hugged briefly before walking again. Mere walked them to an elevator, "I have to go, or I'll be late for rounds."

Arizona nodded, "I told the chief we've been dating for a while." She murmured, and Meredith nodded slowly,

"Good." She sighed and smiled, "I'll see you, bye."

"Bye." Arizona lent forward and kissed her softly, Meredith kissed back.

"Ok, I have to go." She said when she pulled back, "Bye, Zona."

Arizona giggled, "Bye."

Mere pecked Arizona's lips then ran off to the intern locker room, not noticing the gossiping nurses she passed.

Meredith was paged to trauma and ran off where she found Izzie and the other interns.

* * *

Meredith was sitting in the waiting room with Cristina who was eating from a paper bag and Izzie who was stretching her legs.

Arizona zoomed in on her wheelie sneakers and moved to the back of Mere's chair, "I hear your patient's a Mercy West intern." She said,

Mere turned, "Yea, Marshal."

Arizona walked around and sat next to Meredith, "Will he be ok?"

"Probably." Meredith told her, she then noticed Cristina and Izzie trying not to stare, "Oh right, these are my friends, Izzie and Cristina." She said, "Guys this is Arizona, she's my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?"

"Hi," Arizona held out her hand, "Arizona Robbins, I'm a paeds attending surgeon."

Izzie shook her hand, "How long have you been working here?"

"Today's my first day actually, but I like it." She grinned, "Anyway I have to go." She kissed Meredith softly on the lips then stood and wheeled away.

Izzie and Cristina watched her go then turned to Meredith, "Seriously?" They asked,

"Seriously." Confirmed Meredith with a small smirk,

* * *

Later that night Meredith and Arizona were talking, leaning on a wall. They were both smiling and laughing, flirting happily. Addison watched as the familiar blonde woman laughed at something Meredith said, then as Mere brushed the woman's hair away and lent forward, kissing her. When they pulled back Addie cleared her throat and walked over.

"Addie." Said Mere, she turned to Arizona, "Arizona this is my best friend, Add-"

"Addison Montgomery." smiled Arizona, "I follow your work. I'm Dr. Robbins, but call me Arizona." Addison gave a small smile,

"Arizona is a paeds surgeon." Mere told Addie,

"How do you know each other?" Addie asked, though she knew the answer,

"We're dating." Smiled Arizona and Addie noticed that their hands were linked against the wall.

Addie nodded, "Mere can I talk to you?"

"Sure." Meredith let go of Zona, "I'll see you later." She kissed Arizona, who smiled and left, then allowed Addison to pull her by the wrist into a supply closet.

"Whoa, hey!" Meredith's complaints at Addie's roughness were cut short,

"What the hell Meredith?!" Addie exclaimed, "You're out there practically mounting that Robbins girl in front of all the gossipy nurses and you don't even care? When we were together we couldn't even hold hands!"

Meredith frowned, "Addie, you're making it out to be more then it is."

"Am I Meredith?! Because I seem to remember that I couldn't even kiss you in our own house."

"You are! I am not closeted Addie, you know that!"

Addison glared but didn't say anything back; they both just stood breathing heavily. Meredith sighed and ran a hand through her hair, "I'm open about my sexuality Addie." Meredith said quietly, "But when I came to Seattle I wasn't sure what I was in for. I just wanted to fit in, be a surgeon and prove my self. I didn't want to cause a stir; I didn't want to be the intern with the famous mother or the intern everyone judged." As Meredith spoke she started to become more annoyed with Addison, "So when I introduced my self I didn't say '_Hi I'm Meredith Grey –yes Grey as in Ellis Grey- I'm in love with a woman who loves me but refuses to be with me for more then six months, not that it matters because she's married now, leaving me to get drunk and sleep with inappropriate men and sometimes the occasional woman._'."

"If you're so open Meredith, why did you hide us? You didn't hide Derek."

"Yes I did."

"Not to you're friends. You hid us from everyone."

"God Addison! You're Mrs McDreamy! You're Derek's ex wife! The secret that broke my heart! You're supposed to be Satan, the wife that cheated on her husband with his best friend! The dirty ex mistress' enemy! And I know it doesn't work but I do _try_ to keep a certain level of professionalism around here. Going through telling everyone would have led to our past! It wasn't to do with being ashamed Addison, but what we went through is not something I like to talk about! Can you imagine how that conversation would go? _How did we meet? __Well after my rape I was completely broken and Addison took me under her wing, you see she had been raped by the same bastard and she was the only one to understand me_."

Addison glared at her, "You're just full of sarcastic speeches today, aren't you?"

Meredith wanted to hit her, "Do you know how much it hurt having all my secrets flying through this hospital. My mother, my child, my rape. How no-one stood up for me when Derek turned out to be married. How everyone judged me, souly because he was an attending."

"_Robbins_, is an attending!"

"I knew her before."

"No!" yelled Addie, slapping Meredith across the face, "You knew me before!" tears ran down her face as she cried, "You knew me before." She whimpered,

Meredith didn't say anything after that. She just turned around and walked away, leaving Addie alone to cry.

As Meredith walked away she was momentarily surprised no one seemed to notice the fight she'd just had. But her surprise went away as she remembered that Addison and herself were adept at fighting in whispers and hisses. No one had heard.

**review please.**


	24. Call My Name

**Chapter 24 -** **Call My Name**

Izzie, Meredith and Cristina were at the bar at Joe's drinking and watching as Addison played darts with Burke and Derek.

Burke looked at Cristina then threw his dart, it hit close to the middle, "He's picturing my face. He's totally picturing that dart puncturing my skull." Burke threw another dart that hit dead centre, he flexed his muscle and Cristina imitated him, "Look at that."

Addison gave Meredith a filthy look and threw her own darts, Izzie laughed, "She... she is picturing you." Izzie told Meredith,

"She slapped me; she lost the right to picture me."

"So I fall asleep during sex. So what?" Cristina told them, she turned to Burke and spoke loudly, "Ass."

Mere glared at Addie, "Ass!" She hissed,

Alex walked along the bar grabbing his beer,

"Oh, Ass! Hey!" Grinned Izzie,

"Isobel Stevens has finally left the hospital. Does this mean heart patient dude finally kicked it?" He asked,

"I'm sorry. This section of the bar is for surgeons. We don't socialize with gynaecologists." Izzie rebutted,

Alex left and George walked over, "George!" Izzie cheered, then noticed Callie who was with him, "Hey Callie!" she grinned,

"Hey." Smiled Callie, taking a seat,

"Hi." Meredith gave a small smile, "We are complaining about the asses, Addie and Burke."

"Not McDreamy?"

"Derek's a friend." Meredith shrugged, she looked over at the darts, it was Burke's go again, and he was still glaring at Cristina.

* * *

The next day, having arrived at the hospital after a most awkward meeting with the vet, Addison, Meredith and Derek were all in the elevator, the two women on either side of Derek.

"So what's...I mean, is there something going on?" Derek asked looking between them,

"No." Addie and Mere said together,

"Did you have another fight?"

"No." They said again,

The elevator doors opened and Arizona entered, "Hey! How's Doc?" She stood next to Meredith and they held hands,

"He has bone cancer." Derek said with a soft smile,

"Will he be all right?"

"Hopefully."

The doors opened at the next floor and Addison left as quickly as she could, Meredith kissed Arizona and left too, walking in the other direction as Addie.

* * *

Meredith walked to Callie hesitantly, "Hey, we're uh… friends, kinda, right?"

Callie frowned, "I guess."

"So if I asked you a question about my dog you wouldn't yell at me or anything?"

"Your dog?"

"Yeah… He has bone cancer."

"Uh… ok."

"I just wanted to ask if you knew the success rate of curing osteosarcoma."

"In a dog? No. Sorry."

Meredith nodded, "He doesn't have a good chance… does he?"

Callie looked at Meredith oddly, "I don't think so Meredith."

Meredith nodded, "Thanks Callie."

* * *

Arizona walked to Addison's office and knocked. She entered and bit her lip awkwardly.

"You don't like me very much, do you?"

Addison looked up, "I don't really know you."

Arizona nodded, "I'm sorry but I'm having a little trouble because I need to ask you something. And I'll let you know now that I'm probably going to cry, because I'm only new here and even though we're both attendings, I'm only just an attending and I have authority issues. And what I need to ask, I'm not even sure I want the answer to, but I have to ask. So I'm just going to ask you and then you answer and then...uh, I'll go from there, ok?"

"Ok." Addison agreed,

"Are you sleeping with my girlfriend?"

Addison was taken aback by the question, "No… Not since we broke up…"

Arizona nodded and smiled thankfully, "I'm sorry, it just feels a bit like you two are having a lover's quarrel…?"

"No." Addison lied, "We're not. I'm actually seeing someone… Finn… The vet."

Arizona bit her lip, she understood, "Ok…" she let out a breath, "Thanks."

"Arizona. Has Meredith told you… has she told you that if it came to it, I'd choose her over anyone?"

Arizona bit her lip, "No… But I know she loved you."

"Loves." Addison said with a sigh, "Arizona while Meredith and I are not sleeping together, we are in love. I was in love with her through my marriage and I doubt I'll stop being in love with her…"

"But you broke her." Arizona frowned, "You broke up with her and she felt so empty and alone."

"She's not ready for the relationship I want. She's not ready to be tied down."

"So what am I then? Rebound? Left overs? Seconds?" Tears formed in her eyes, "She's screwing me to get over being screwed? I'm just a fling."

She stormed out and Addison cursed, even though deep down, she felt a little better knowing Meredith would soon be single once more.

* * *

Meredith was walking along a corridor when she heard someone run up behind her and grab her arm.

"Oh, Hey Zona."

"Meredith I need to talk to you."

"Now isn't a good time, we'll talk later." Meredith gave her an apologetic smile,

"No Meredith we have to talk about Dr. Montgomery and how I know you're sleeping with her."

Meredith froze her eyes lost their warmth, "We'll talk about this later." She murmured before walking away,

"You walk away? That's all I get?" Arizona followed Meredith out onto the flyover,

"Calm down, please." Meredith insisted, "And don't yell." She continued to walk away,

"What? What you're not going to yell at me?" exclaimed Arizona, "Slap me? Call me names, or I don't know use me to get over someone else?"

"What do you want from me Arizona?"

"I want you to care about me! I just accused you of sleeping with your best friend and you didn't even deny it! You flirt with her and let her flirt with you. What do I have to do Meredith? Maybe, hmm I don't know, maybe I should go on a date with Finn, because that seems to something that sends you into some sort of blind rage_._ But no, that won't work because I am not Addison Montgomery!"

Meredith stared at Arizona completely shocked. She looked down and below the fly over stood the chief, Derek, Cristina, some of the nurses and of course, Addison.

She walked away.

**I am aware that Arizona was quite out of character, but i did my best, lol. Review!!!**


	25. You're My Flame

_Hey guys, here's the last chapter :) i hope you like it. WARNING SMUT AHEAD_

**Chapter 25 - You're My Flame  
**

Meredith and Cristina stood outside a conference room, leaning on a nurses' station listening to Alex and George try to organise a prom with Natalie and Claire, the best friends of the chief's dying niece.

"I didn't like teenage girls when I was a teenage girl." Cristina commented,

"I wore a lot of black. I had the whole angry pink hair thing going on. I wouldn't have been caught dead at a prom. Addison almost killed me, she'd pulled favours so she would have the night off to help me get ready."

"My mother made me go." Cristina rolled her eyes, "My date barfed on my dress and then tried to feel me up."

"There's a lot to be said for being an adult." Laughed Meredith,

"Yeah."

Meredith sighed, "You haven't mentioned Burke."

Izzie had gone a bit crazy with Denny, almost killing him and consequently stealing a heart –hence the prom organising- and Burke had been shot as he came back to the hospital from mercy West.

"No." Cristina straitened up and walking over to the waiting area, flopping into a chair.

Meredith followed, "Well, have you checked on him?"

"No."

"Ok, I could try harder to make you open up and share and deal with the Burke thing, or I could be neurotic and selfish and talk about me and my problems. Which would be more supportive right now?"

"Selfish and neurotic please."

Meredith nodded, "The vet says Doc's in pain. And Derek and I have to talk about whether we should put him to sleep or not. Which is..." she sighed, "And Arizona thinks there's something going on between me and Addison, which there is not. There so clearly is not… And her having that whole meltdown…" a small pause, "I mean, dogs get sick and we're expected to put them to sleep. People get sick, we don't put them down. We don't just give up on people… There's _nothing_ going on between me and Addie."

"There is a lot to be said for being an adult." Cristina murmured,

"Yeah."

* * *

Meredith was walking through the halls when she rounded a corner and walked straight into Arizona.

"Meredith!"

"Hey."

"I heard about… What happened?" Arizona fell into step with Mere,

"I don't want to talk about it."

"All right…" nodded Zona, "Mere… about yesterday…"

"We're fine."

"We are?" Checked Arizona, they both stopped,

"We are fine."

"And I was jealous when there was no need to be… Right?"

Meredith lent forward and brushed her lips softly over Arizona's.

"Meredith…"

"What?"

"Will you go to the prom with me?" Meredith laughed and agreed,

* * *

It was almost time for prom; Meredith was at home with Izzie and Callie getting ready. Meredith's dress was simple. A shimmering black dress that reached the ground and had a dipping neckline that wasn't to low. She curled her hair slightly and with minimal makeup and accessories she was ready. Her pager went off and she looked at it quickly.

**Emergency surgery. Can't make prom. Sorry. xx Arizona.**

Meredith groaned. She pulled out her cell and rang Derek.

"Hey… can you do me a favour?"

Twenty minutes later Meredith walked to the second floor nurses' station and waiting area where the prom was. Derek and Addison both watched her, Derek grinned and walked to her, holding out his arm.

"M'Lady."

"Dear Sir." Laughed Meredith, they walked to the dance floor and Meredith placed one hand on Derek's shoulder the other in his hand, his other rested on her waist. Meredith briefly wondered how much more intimate this would be had Addison not shown up, she had a small feeling Derek still had those kinds of feelings for her.

Finn walked through the crowd and found Addison, they kissed once softly.

"You look great." He smiled,

Addison laughed, "Thank you. You look… nice."

"Come on, let's have some fun."

"Fun?"

"I love prom." Finn told her, leading her to the dance floor, "I don't want to brag, but I was crowned king."

Addison laughed, "This whole thing brings back very traumatic memories of being a band geek with braces and the lisp; spending the whole evening with _Skippy Gold_, talking about _Star Wars_."

Finn chuckled, "you know you're a lot hotter then my last date."

"Thanks, I think." Laughed Addison,

Over the floor Derek grinned and Meredith with a teasing smile, "So am I gonna get lucky tonight?"

"Oh I don't know about that." Grinned Meredith, "Maybe."

"Maybe lucky?"

She laughed and moved closer, resting her cheek in the crook of his neck.

"Liz, uh...Liz was my wife." Finn told Addison quietly, "And when she died...You do this thing, you know, where you stop making plans. Because you had plans, but then there was a car crash and your plans disappeared. So you just...I just try and get from sunup till sundown. That's as far into the future as I can handle. And I've been fine with that. I have. But right now, looking at you...Damn, I have all kinds of plans." He grinned, but when Addison said nothing, it turned to a frown, "Don't freak out."

"I'm no freaking out." Addison told him,

"You're not?"

"Nope." Addison shrugged, "You have plans."

Finn smiled, "I have plans."

They moved closer to each other, Addison's arms draped around his neck, his arms secure around her waist.

Meredith looked across the dance floor and saw Addison watching her form over Finn's shoulder. For what seemed like an age the two women watched each other, looking deeply into their blue eyes.

Meredith pulled back from Derek, "Sorry, I just have to… splash water on my face, I'm a bit hot."

"Ok." Smiled Derek,

Addison watched and pulled back from Finn, "I have a patient to check on… Sorry. I'll be back."

"You're freaking out."

Addison pecked his cheek, "I just need a minute."

She followed Meredith away from the prom and ran after her in a corridor.

"Meredith!"

"Leave me alone." Meredith ran into an empty exam room, Addison walked in after her,

"Meredith!"

"Just leave me alone!"

"I just want to make sure you're ok."

"No!" exclaimed Meredith, "I'm not ok! Are you satisfied? I'm not all right!" she glared at Addie as she spoke, "Because you broke up with me and you have a boyfriend and you slapped me and our dog died and now you're _looking at me_… Stop looking at me!"

"I'm not looking at you Meredith."

"_You_ are looking at me!" Meredith yelled, "And _you watch me_. And Arizona is beautiful, and romantic, and makes me breakfast. I like Arizona, she's perfect for me! And I'm _really trying_ here to be happy! But I_ can't breathe!_ I can't breathe with you _looking at me like that!_ So just stop!"

"You think I want to look at you? That I want to watch you fall for another woman? Or I wouldn't rather be looking at my boyfriend? Finn's amazing, he has _plans_. God, Finn doesn't drive me crazy, Finn doesn't make it impossible for me to feel normal! Finn doesn't make me sick to my stomach thinking about Arizona Robbins touching him with her hands! God Meredith, I would give _anything_ not to be looking at you!"

Meredith looked at Addison with tears in her eyes. Addison looked back, also crying slightly. They both moved to each other and their lips met.

Meredith gasped slightly and her arms slid around Addison's waist while Addie caressed Meredith's cheeks. They moved around in a circle and Meredith pressed Addison into an exam table. Addison moved to sit on it and pulled Meredith closer to her body.

The zip on the back of Meredith's dress pulled and Addison's hands moved over the exposed skin, then up over Meredith's shoulder, letting the top of the dress fall away. Addison's lips found Meredith's collar bone.

Meredith moaned softly and undid the clip in Addison's hair, letting it fall loose. Her small hands buried in the red mass. Meredith climbed onto the table, straddling Addison's lap, and undid the clasp at the neck of Addison's red dress which slipped down and with a little help slid along Addison's body and pooled in a pile on the floor leaving Addison bare, with only a pair of white lace panties and lace-hemmed garter-stockings under her expensive shoes.

Addison pulled at Meredith's dress and it fell down as well, but unable to fall to the ground, gathered instead at Meredith's knees. Meredith pushed Addison slightly, making her lie back propped up on her elbows, Meredith kissed from her jaw line below her ear, down to the valley of her naked breasts.

Meredith continued to explore Addison's body with her mouth, moving south so that she had to move back from her position straddling her and her dress fell, joining Addison's on the floor.

Addison's hips bucked and she moved up, propped on her hands rather then her elbows, as Meredith rolled the panties and stockings down her long legs. With a kick the shoes, stockings, and the panties fell on top of the dresses. Addison shivered slightly but Meredith's lips were moving against hers again, and she lost all thought.

Her hand moved down Meredith's waist, over her hip and down into Meredith's black panties, Meredith gasped and climbed back up on her knees over Addison. Addison pushed back so she lent on one hand, the other continuing its torture on Meredith, whose hips were bucking into Addison. Meredith gasped and her hands found Addison's shoulders as she moaned.

As Meredith climaxed they both fell back, lying on the exam table. Addison's hand slowly pulled out of Meredith's panties and fell off the exam table flopped in the air.

Meredith helped Addison to move up along the table, and then moved over her, her mouth claiming Addison's breasts and her fingers moved between Addison's thighs.

Addison's hips thrust into Meredith's hand, as her own hand flew to her mouth and she moaned over her fingers.

"_Meredith_." She gasped, clutching at the blonde woman.

* * *

Meredith and Addison were rushing to get dressed. Meredith pulled up her dress and tried to fasten the back as Addison slipped her own dress over her head and clasped the neck fastening.

"What does this mean?" She asked Meredith,

Meredith stepped back into her shoes then shoved Addison's into the redhead's arms, "Put your shoes on."

"Meredith…"

"_On_." Meredith tried to fix Addison's hair, clipping it back in place haphazardly,

"Where are my panties?" asked Addison, "I had panties, and stockings. Where are they?"

"Hold still." Meredith finished with Addison's hair,

"Meredith where are-" The door opened and interrupted Addison,

It was Callie, "Oh," She said, looking between the two flushed and flustered women, Addison's makeup smudged and Meredith's hair mussed, "The nurse told me to come find you. You have to come now. It's Izzie."

Meredith stepped forward, to leave, "Wait, wait, wait." Callie fixed Meredith's dress, "Ok, go."

* * *

Addison having retouched her make up and fixed her hair again, walked to a corridor where she found Finn and Derek chatting.

"Hey."

"Hey, you okay… You disappeared." Finn asked, concerned. Addison felt slightly sick.

"Yeah I just- Yeah, I'm fine."

"Good." He smiled,

Arizona walked through the halls in dark blue scrubs, she wheeled towards Derek, "Hey, have you seen Mere?" She asked,

Addison swallowed thickly and looked away awkwardly, Derek frowned at Arizona, "Uh, no, she said she needed to freshen up but that was…"

"Shepherd." Richard called as he and Bailey walked over,

"Yes."

"Uh, have you seen Bailey's interns? Grey? Yang? I'm looking for Izzie Stevens in particular."

"No. No."

"Chief." Murmured Bailey,

They looked down the corridor to see Alex, Meredith and George walking with a distraught Izzie slowly towards them.

They passed and Alex started down the steps, George about to follow when he saw Izzie had stopped.

"It was me." She said, tears in her eyes, "I cut his LVAD wire. I did it. No one helped me. And now ...I thought I was a surgeon, but... I can't. I thought I was a surgeon, but I'm not …So I quit."

"Izzie." Bailey murmured, but Izzie left with George, following Alex.

"What happened?" Asked Arizona softly,

"Denny Duquette died." Richard said, and he walked away with Bailey and Derek.

"Come on, I'll take you home." Arizona said to Meredith softly.

Addison was watching them, not realising Finn was walking away thinking she was with him. He turned to her.

"Addison."

Addison blinked and looked at him,

"Addison…" Meredith murmured quietly, but Addie heard and looked back at her.

Arizona frowned, "Meredith?"

**END**

_hehe. Ok the sequel will be up soon, and to those flamers (how i love you so) i will try better in future to make my work more original but it is important to the storyline i have planned to keep dancing through the episode. but i'll make it less pronounced :) And about the Arizona OOC lets think of it as character growth, she is not as she is in Grey's because this is her past, What happened between Meredith and herself made her who she is on the show... lol  
_

_**Better to write for yourself and have no public, then to write for the public and have no self. ~**i cant remember who said that but it is a famous quote :P  
_


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